


Cupids Might Aim (But I’m the Better Archer)

by musicanova



Series: Sing Me to Sleep (Our Beds are Burning) [1]
Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Australia, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Not K-Pop Idols, Angst, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff and Crack, M/M, Mutual Pining, Pining, also lowkey chat fic elements!, but i'm being more lowkey about it aight, it seems my readers think this is angstier than i do so have another warning, it's not t o o much but it is there you know? just some angst in moderation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-05
Updated: 2019-02-22
Packaged: 2019-07-24 21:45:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 28
Words: 32,994
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16183787
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/musicanova/pseuds/musicanova
Summary: Seungmin and Hyunjin have a plan. So do Minho and Jisung. When four out of seven people in a friendship group are fake dating, there's no way that chaos doesn't come into the picture.





	1. ☁ Hyunjin ☁

**Author's Note:**

  * For [tumblr user sehunhoney](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=tumblr+user+sehunhoney).



> W e o w that's a crappy summary, so if you clicked on this, thank you very much! 
> 
> Just as reference, here's the details on your main (and not so main) characters. In brackets is just a vague idea of what they're doing at university, since I don't touch on it too much: 
> 
> [FIRST YEARS — 2001 (17-18)]
> 
>   * Jeongin (ECEC)
> 

> 
> [SECOND YEARS — 2000 (18-19)]
> 
>   * Hyunjin (Dance)
>   * Jisung (Writing)
>   * Felix (ECEC)
>   * Seungmin (Photography)
> 

> 
> [THIRD YEARS — 1999 (19-20)]
> 
>   * Changbin (Music)
> 

> 
> [FOURTH YEARS — 1998 (20-21)]
> 
>   * Minho (Dance)
> 


**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to Australia, 2019, where (most of) Stray Kids are suffering university students.

` _3rd April, 2019_ `

The plan is simple. 

Be loud about a cafe date on Thursday, be _just_ a little bit touchier than usual at said cafe date, and then finally, _finally_ , have Minho and Jisung off their backs. 

Well, Jisung and Minho. Because it’s mostly Jisung. But Hyunjin likes the ring of “Minho and Jisung” better than “Jisung and Minho”. 

(It has nothing to do with the fact that Minho shouted him to free ice cream just last week.)

Hyunjin revels in the look of utter shock Seungmin gives him when he announces his plan. Yes, the boy might own over half of the brain cells in their friendship, but only Hyunjin could come up with something as brilliant as this.

(It’s a blatant lie — but Hyunjin is in the mood for flattering himself.) 

“I think this is just stupid enough for it to work,” Seungmin says. 

It’s as good a compliment as Hyunjin will ever get. 

(Also a blatant lie — Seungmin compliments him all the time. But it’s always mumbled, and Hyunjin thinks he’s not supposed to have heard it.)

 

☁ ☁ ☁

 

They’ve just scored the last empty booth in the library, and the others are on their way. A quick check of the group chat confirms that Jeongin’s tute’ll finish in five, and Minho is almost up the stairs with Jisung in close pursuit. 

Perfect timing. 

“Do you wanna go grab a coffee with me this Thursday?” Hyunjin asks. 

Smooth, suave, served with a smirk. 

Wow, talk about an acting _God_. 

“Sure, Jinnie. 11:30 at Bearistas?”

“It’s a date.” 

Hyunjin plonks himself down in the seat next to Seungmin, then pretends to startle with a high-pitched scream when Minho appears from behind him. 

“Don’t scare me like that! We’re in a library!” he whines.

“And we’re on thin fucking ice. Remember when you made Jeongin cry of laughter and we got kicked out?” Seungmin says pointedly at Minho, but only the guy’s body is present with them; he’s too busy tapping away at his phone screen, a devious smile on his face.

When Jisung saunters over to their table, eyes glued to his phone screen, he has a similar expression. He doesn’t greet everyone until he’s nestled into Minho’s side.

Seungmin and Hyunjin give each other a look. 

The wheels are in motion. 

 

☁ ☁ ☁

 

See the thing is, Minho and Jisung are not nearly as subtle as they would like to think. This phrase refers to them in more ways than one. 

First of all (and this is the one most pertinent to Hyunjin), these kids think they’re being all slick trying to play Cupid on him and Seungmin, when in reality, Seungmin caught on 0.2 seconds into their plan, and just last month Hyunjin literally saw Jisung’s “Cupid Notebook” sticking out from his bag. It’s been 153 days and counting of them consistently wiggling eyebrows, making suggestive comments, and dodging out of group activities while dragging the rest of their friends with them to give him and Seungmin some “alone time”. 

Second of all, everyone and their dead great grandmother knows Minho and Jisung have the hots for each other. Except for the blind dumb shits themselves, of course, but that’s where Hyunjin’s gonna take a page from Jisung’s book (The Cupid Notebook, to be exact), and come dashing in with a bow and arrow. 

Or Seungmin will, since he’s more talented at archery out of the two of them. 

Also third of all, Minho thinks he can get away with cheating off of Hyunjin’s homework for Dance History. And that is so not on, because Hyunjin should be cheating off Minho. Which isn’t to say that Hyunjin condones cheating in any way, but it’s more so the fact that Minho is two years his senior, and therefore should have more knowledge in this field than Hyunjin; _does_ have more knowledge in this field than Hyunjin, and as such should be applying said knowledge into completing his work himself.

Arsehole. 

In any case, despite all the holes that Seungmin has identified, Hyunjin’s plan is excellent. In one fell swoop, it’ll stop Minho and Jisung from trying to get them to date because they’ll think him and Seungmin _are_ dating, and on top of that, it’ll give Hyunjin enough breathing space to start playing Cupid on them. 

Hyunjin snuggles into Seungmin’s side, satisfied smile plastered on his face, returning his attention back to the movie. 

“Get off me,” Seungmin says, pushing at the boy latched onto his side weakly. “It’s too hot for this, and I’m not turning the air con on.” 

“Yes, yes, energy conservation, I know,” Hyunjin replies, making no effort to move. 

Seungmin rolls his eyes, but doesn’t protest any further, instead bringing a hand up to play with Hyunjin’s hair.

See, this is the kind of comfortable friendship that Hyunjin loves. He gets conscious of it at times, the whole cuddling thing, but old habits die hard, and this is one he’s had since birth. He also doesn’t plan on trying to get rid of it.

Hyunjin sometimes wonders where the basis of Minho and Jisung’s… Cupid-ing expedition was born. They couldn’t have started it without any sort of foundation, that’s too risky. And if that was the case, then that could only mean that Hyunjin was being too obvious about his feelings. 

But how? 

He thought he’d been hiding it so well. For starters, he’s cuddly with _everyone_ , Minho and Jisung included, and him and Seungmin have been attached at the hip since before they were even two years old, so they couldn’t have drawn conclusions from there. Not to mention, Seungmin has literally only confessed to Hyunjin that he’s bi. And despite being so close, Hyunjin was shocked to all hell, so there’s no way anyone else could know about that. How could Minho and Jisung think that Seungmin would have any interest in him without knowing about that? 

They must realise that not everyone is a flaming homosexual like Minho is. 

This is not the first time these sorts of thoughts have plagued his mind. But it’s Wednesday, which means it’ll certainly be the last. Tomorrow, Seungmin and Hyunjin will go on a date. Tomorrow, Minho and Jisung will catch them on their date. Tomorrow, all of this match-making nonsense will end.

Well, only on Minho and Jisung’s part. 

_Hyunjin’s_ match-making nonsense is only about to begin. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any mistakes! I don't know how often I can update this fic, but the plan is you'll be getting chapters every week! And I'll let you know when I need to take a break, so don't worry!


	2. ★ Seungmin ★

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As mentioned in the tags, I'm being subtly Aussie about things this time 'round, so it'll be kind of scarce throughout and unless people ask I'm not gonna be offering clarifications either. Everything should be there in a way that you can make assumptions and not need to know the details to understand things? They might not be, so oops if that's the case...
> 
> But even so if I've lost you, don't hesitate to ask!

` _4th April, 2019_ `

**** The plan is simple. 

Seungmin knows this, but he’s still nervous. He doesn’t show it, because he’s Kim Seungmin: unflappable, calm, steady Kim Seungmin. But in reality, his palms are sweaty, knees weak, arms are heavy (m _o_ m’s spaghetti?). 

He takes a deep breath. It can’t be that difficult to fake date your best friend, right? There are like, multiple Romantic Comedies based around this plot line and they all work splendidly (Seungmin would know, Hyunjin loves to watch them), and if you’re already in love with the person, what could possibly be so hard about fake dating them? 

(So, so, _so_ many things. Seungmin’s been overthinking it for three days straight, so he has every worst possible outcome stacked up in the library of his mind. Oddly enough though, it’s a risk he’s willing to take to get Jisung and Minho off his back.) 

“Babe!” Seungmin hears a familiar voice say.

It sends a shiver up his spine, and not in a good way. Babe is a word that reminds him of overly friendly, fake-tanned cashiers at City Beach who play with their bleached blonde hair when an attractive guy walks in. “How can I help you, babe?” along with “Sure thing, babe, the shirt you’re looking for is just this way,” are both phrases that have forced Seungmin to never step foot in a City Beach ever again. 

“I told you to stop calling me that,” he hisses at Hyunjin, slapping the guy’s arm. 

“Aw, does that make my Honey Bear shy?” Hyunjin says with a pout, rubbing at his left arm. 

Seungmin crosses his arms.

“Yes. Yes it does.” 

He turns into the cafe, ignoring Hyunjin’s cooing. In his busyness to stop his cheeks from blushing, he forgets to reject Honey Bear as a nickname as well — it’ll surely be something he’ll regret later — but his mind is focused on other things: Bearistas is Seungmin’s sanctuary, and he refuses to have it ruined by the word “babe”. 

Right before his hand reaches the door to the cafe, Seungmin hears a rustling in the bushes to his left, and he looks over to see a tuft of caramel hair. It’s a messy quiff, much like the one Jisung likes to do. There’s also a black beanie next to the quiff, but the two disappear into the green leaves after a little more shuffling.

_Wow_ , Seungmin thinks. _Almost as if I didn’t see anything._

He smirks in time with the jingle of the bell on top of the door, stepping into the cafe. 

“Oi dude, I think we should take an outside table. Our audience is already here.” 

Hyunjin lets out a bark of laughter. 

“Already? I didn’t realise those two were capable of waking up this early if it’s not for class.”

“I didn’t realise those two were capable of waking up this early full stop,” Seungmin counters. 

It’s true: neither of them have turned up to their 9am lectures since the first week of semester, and it’s not for a lack of caring. 

While waiting in line, Hyunjin loops his arm with Seungmin’s. A simple gesture that’s not uncommon, but one that makes Seungmin’s heart race right now. It has different implications this time, and that simple fact is doing Seungmin’s head in. His palms are starting to sweat again, and he shifts his wallet from hand to hand. 

“Are you nervous?” Hyunjin whispers in his ear, making Seungmin flinch. 

“Of course I’m nervous. You’re the one who dreamt of becoming an actor, not me.”

“C’mon, it’ll be fine, Minnie.” 

Seungmin huffs. It’s something he does a lot around his idiotic friends. 

“I hate to break it to you but you’re not exactly the easiest person to pretend to be in love with, Hyunjin. I mean, who could be stupid enough to fall in love with you? For God’s sake you still have breakfast on the corner of your mouth.” 

Seungmin unlinks their arms to reach up and brush the bread crumbs off of Hyunjin’s lips, then turns around to look stoically at the ground. 

“You already love me, what’s so hard about pretending to be _in_ love with me?” Hyunjin wheedles, poking Seungmin in the side. 

Seungmin barely manages to mutter a “shut up” before they’re next in the line.

The man on the other side of the counter brightens significantly at the sight of Seungmin. He’s not sure how it’s possible, because Woojin already looks as radiant as the sun as is, but he won’t question it. 

“Welcome to Bearistas. Back so soon?” Woojin grins. 

“Of course, hyung. What would I do without your cafe?”

“Perish, probably, considering how often you’re here. Do you want your usual?” 

“Yes please. And a mint choc chip frappe for this one,” he replies, pointing at Hyunjin. 

With his best puppy eyes Hyunjin has the audacity to beg for cake too (Seungmin knows it’s mostly because he’s not the one paying), and with all of his remaining strength he sighs. Seungmin hates not being able to deny this boy.

“Surprise us with a slice of cake of your choice?” 

“I most certainly can, that’ll be $11.80. Cake on the house, since it’s my choice.”

Seungmin wants to protest, but there’s no arguing with Woojin. There never is with a man with so much authority. He’s the kind of guy you look at and instinctively want to bow to; show him how much you respect him. It’s certainly what Seungmin did the first time he walked in and ordered a chai tea, but the two have a pact not to mention that it ever happened. 

Seungmin pays, not forgetting to have his membership card stamped, and tries very hard to keep his heart rate in check when Hyunjin wraps his arms around him again, unable to keep his hands to himself. But there’s solace in the steady constant that is Kim Woojin’s unwavering smile. Seungmin takes it to gather himself, and turns around with his table number to sit outside. 

What was that saying? 

The show must go on. 


	3. ☀ Jisung ☀

` _4th April, 2019_ `

**** The plan is simple. 

Well, for someone with instincts as sharp as a ninja and the reflexes of a squirrel on steroids, the plan is simple. Jisung’s not so sure about Minho. The guy’s about as fast as a sloth if dancing isn’t involved. Either way, staking out in the bushes next to Bearistas and getting a few happy snaps of Seungmin and Hyunjin couldn’t possibly be that difficult of a task.

Hiding in a bush is easy. It’s like second nature to Jisung! And for once his small stature comes in handy, because there’s no way anyone could spot him. For a moment, he wishes his companion were Changbin, who’s about the size of a twelve-year-old girl, but then he remembers he doesn’t like the guy half as much as he likes Minho, and the thought fades away. 

The plan begins with them agreeing on meeting up at 11, because Seungmin is too punctual for his own good, and arriving at 11:30 will give them no time to prepare themselves. Because Jisung is not punctual enough for his own good, he arrives at 11:10, but Minho arrives at 11:11, so things are alright. 

They settle themselves into the bushes, phones fully charged and poised, and by 11:15 when Seungmin arrives, everything is according to plan.

Jisung snaps a few photos of Seungmin twiddling his thumbs in the name of practice shots, then opens up his messaging app to text Minho. 

 

**— private chat: Jisungus Bungus & Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ**

Jisungus Bungus: did u bring ur portable charger?  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : ye dingus  
Jisungus Bungus: no need to be r00d  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : y we txtin  
Jisungus Bungus: what do u mean “y we txtin” i’m  
Jisungus Bungus: seungmin is like a BAT he would hear us if we so much as BREATHED  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : oh  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : i’ve been breathing tho  
Jisungus Bungus: i’m  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : you’re  
Jisungus Bungus: shut up  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : (ФДФ)  
Jisungus Bungus: shut up h y u n g  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : thank u 

 

Minho giggles then, and Jisung shoots him a sharp look. But glancing over at Seungmin, the guy seems too preoccupied in looking around for Hyunjin that he hasn’t noticed them. Jisung checks the time. Typically, it’s 11:31, and Hyunjin is late. Jisung would laugh, except that if he were in Hyunjin’s shoes he’d be even later. 

It’s 11:36 when Hyunjin arrives, and he makes his grand entrance by yelling “babe!” which almost has Jisung falling out of his hiding spot. 

All this time they’ve been trying to play match-maker, and Seungmin and Hyunjin are already so far into their relationship for Hyunjin to casually be calling Seungmin _babe_?

Jisung recollects himself. It’s alright, maybe that’s the first time he’s used that pet name. But the ground beneath him shakes when Seungmin grumbles at Hyunjin to stop calling him that. 

How could he have been so blind? He’s wasted months on this project! Months! And to think the two were already dating! 

It’s no matter. At this rate, even after everything that’s happening before his eyes, Jisung and Minho are still set to win the bet. All they need is a couple of photos of Seungmin and Hyunjin being love bugs, and he’s on his way to being 50 bucks richer. 25, if his friends decide to be stingy and make him split with Minho instead of giving them 50 each. 

The two take their damn sweet time in ordering something inside the cafe, and Jisung feels antsy, shifting around in the bushes. 

“Oi, stop that,” Minho whispers, and right at that moment he wraps his arms around Jisung to stifle his movements. 

Jisung elbows Minho in the stomach, because what did he tell you, ninja instincts and squirrel reflexes, and he furiously lifts the collar of his shirt up to cover the blush rising up his neck. 

“Jisung, it’s not cool to pop your collar anymore. Leave that behind in the 2000s,” Minho reaches a hand out, but Jisung slaps it away.

“I’m not trying to be _cool_ , this is called sun safety, you heathen. Watch me laugh over your grave when you die of skin cancer.”

“Yes, yes, slip slop slap, no hat no play, whatever.”

It takes Jisung and Minho far too long to realise that they’re sticking out of the bushes, and it’s with a lot of vigour that they drop to the ground. They’re safe, as far as Jisung’s aware, because Seungmin and Hyunjin are still inside ordering, but Jisung knows that was a really close call.

Sitting on the ground beside the bushes, Jisung turns to Minho. 

“I don’t think this is working out. What if we find ourselves a table instead? Grab some newspapers, cover ourselves up, it’ll be fine.” 

Minho grins.

“You’re a genius, Jisungie.”

Well when Minho says it like that, Jisung sure as hell feels like one.

He thanks his popped collar that’s totally up in the name of sun safety, and starts sneaking his way over to a table. The free newspapers are inside (damn it, Bearistas), but the menu is just big enough for Jisung to cover his face with. Besides, if he’s sitting down looking at the menu without anything on his table, he just looks like an indecisive person, rather than a broke uni student who can’t actually afford to order anything. 

The table they choose leaves only two others open outside, and Jisung prays that Seungmin and Hyunjin take the one that’s closer to them, so that he can eavesdrop on their conversations. Honestly, he’d take anything to be able to record Hyunjin actually calling Seungmin “babe”. “Honey Bear” is fine too, since that seems to be Seungmin’s preference, but “babe” is really just the icing on the cake, pet names considered. 

Anyone who calls Seungmin “babe” and makes it out the other side without a dagger sticking out of their chest is a hero.

(Jisung is very aware of this fact. He had a phase five years ago where he tried to practice wooing girls with his friends — in his defence he was young, naïve, and fully of the idea that he was straight — and he ended up with a bloody nose when he called Seungmin “babe”. It’s partially his own fault because his shoelaces were untied and one thing led to another, but even so, he came out with battle scars after having used that word on Seungmin.)

He gives Minho a small smile, and brings the menu higher up his face when he notices Seungmin and Hyunjin walking out of the cafe with their table number.


	4. ☾ Minho ☾

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aye yo your buddy's here with an update to celebrate the comeback tonight so please enjoyyyy

` _4th April, 2019_ `

**** The plan is simple. 

Minho doesn’t know what the plan exactly is because he wasn’t paying attention, too busy staring at Jisung’s lips, but he’s pretty sure it’s simple.

He got the gist of it, anyway. 

Catch Seungmin and Hyunjin on their date and make sure to have evidence so they can win the bet, right?

(To Minho's credit, he  _is_ right.)

It’s kind of embarrassing, if he thinks about. Yes, he’s totally in it to win some cash off his friends and to _finally_ see Seungmin and Hyunjin together, but he had an ulterior motive to starting all of this. And if a person were to guess that this ulterior motive was to be able to spend more time with Jisung, then why yes, Minho would have to tell said person that they were absolutely, positively, dead-on correct. 

He’s whipped, he knows, keep your damn mouth shut. 

Minho pulls his beanie further down his head so that his eyebrows are covered, making Jisung laugh. He continues to pull it down so that he can barely see, then picks up a menu for himself. 

Seungmin and Hyunjin take a seat at the table they wanted them to (score), and Minho almost snorts at how Hyunjin places his chin in his hands, adoring heart eyes directed straight at Seungmin. God, the kid is almost as bad as Felix when he first met Changbin. Except that those two got their shit together in a matter of months, whereas the two sitting before them… 

Well, Minho doesn’t know when exactly they started dating, but either way it definitely took them years to get there.

 

☾ ☾ ☾

 

Minho thinks him and Jisung are doing a pretty good job. Maybe they’re not, but in the least, Seungmin and Hyunjin are so absorbed in each other that they haven’t noticed the table of suspicious beings taking photos of them. When their order arrives, Hyunjin doesn’t hesitate to immediately swipe some cream on Seungmin’s nose, and even though both their phones are on silent, Minho swears he hears Jisung’s shutter go off with the speed and intensity he’s taking photos at. 

Minho takes his time with his photos. He’s no photography major like Seungmin, and he’s no artist, but he frames the shot nicely before pressing the button. It’s more so to make his victory taste sweeter when he serves it to the rest of his friends than anything else, but you know. 

Jisung has switched from camera to voice memo and is trying to inch his phone closer to the edge of the table in order to catch some conversation when Seungmin notices them.

“Hey!” he waves, nonchalant as ever while he gets up to walk to their table, as if Minho and Jisung aren’t seeing him on a date with his boyfriend. “What are you guys doing here?” 

“We’re on a date,” Minho says, matter-of-factly. He doesn’t know _why_ he says it matter-of-factly, because it’s not true, and it spilt out of his mouth on impulse, but that’s just what happens. 

“Oh, wow,” Hyunjin replies, stunned.

Seungmin supplies a “We had no idea! Congratulations, guys!”

“Well I mean,” Jisung says, flipping his hair like he’s 2010 Justin Bieber, “It’s our first date, so. Right babe?” 

Minho swears his whole world stops. He scrambles to recollect himself, and digs his nails into his palm to keep himself grounded. It won’t do to unravel here.

“Um, excuse you, _babe_ , this is our fourth date, so I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

His mind is racing a mile a minute. He just lied to their friends’ faces that he was dating his crush (his lowkey _illegal_ crush, mind you, Jisung only just turned 18 towards the end of last year and Minho is literally turning 21 in October — Jesus he’s such a predator), Jisung decided to just up and smoothly play along with his lie, and now they’re going to have to keep up this pretence for God knows how long because Minho and Jisung are _stupid_ and this plan was _stupid_ and it’s _not simple at all!!!!!!!!!!_

“I- tell me what our first date was. I dare you. I double dog dare you. Triple dog dare you!”

“Oh,” Seungmin butts in. “Now that I think about it. Your first date was last month, right? When you went to the planetarium. I totally remember! Wow, we’re so stupid for not noticing.” 

Minho fights the urge to slap Seungmin silly. Yes, Minho had invited Jisung to the planetarium with him with the idea that “oh, this would be nice if it were a date” but he didn’t _tell_ Jisung that, and it wasn’t a date. It was just something that he could do as a friend to help clear Jisung’s mind because he was having writer’s block. 

And it worked! 

So. 

“What? But you said-”

“Yes, I said that was to help you clear your writer’s block but it was obviously a date, dumbarse. You’re so stupid. Did you need me to shout it from the rooftops before you realised I was your boyfriend or?” 

Jisung pouts. Minho fights the urge to kiss it away, because right now in this position, he’s technically allowed to. He could just pass it off later as trying to be convincing, anyway. Maybe he should. But he shouldn’t, it’d be awkward. And what if Jisung realises in the way that Minho’s kissing him that he wants it to be for real? But then it’d totally blow Seungmin and Hyunjin out of the water and it’d feel so good. But the consequences. But the realism! But the consequences. But the- 

“Wait then what’s our second and third date?” 

“Mate, you’re a fucking lost cause, I swear to God,” Hyunjin laughs, slapping Jisung on the back. “Look what you’ve done to your boyfriend!” 

Everyone turns to Minho. 

“Look at his face! He’s in shock!” 

Hyunjin is holding his stomach, laughing, and Jisung reaches out a trembling hand to hold Minho’s with.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry, please forgive me. I didn’t know! What was our second and third date?” 

“The NightOwl run at one in the morning where we had a satanic ritual with our frozen cokes and played on the swings at the park. _Literally_ the movie night where we made out on the couch for half an hour.”

He hears Jisung choke at that one, and Hyunjin laughs even harder, almost dropping to the ground. 

“You made out for half an hour and still didn’t realise it was a date?” 

Seungmin is in stitches too, clutching onto the back of a chair to keep himself stable. 

“Listen, in my defence! Oi, listen to me! In my defence, we hadn’t officially declared anything yet, so I thought we were just like… having fun? Or something?”

Minho fights the urge to start laughing himself, too.It was totally worth making up that lie to see this reaction.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Jisung,” Seungmin wheezes. 

Jesus fucking Christ indeed.


	5. ☁ Hyunjin ☁

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one hasn't been proofread I'm swamped rn but I'll come back to check it alright? I'll respond to everyone's comments later!!

` _4th April, 2019_ `

**** Minho and Jisung leave after a while of chatting. It’s weird, because despite being on a date they never ordered anything, and there’s a really strange distance between the two when they walk off, as if they’re suddenly conscious of how close they usually are to each other. 

Hyunjin settles back down to his table where Seungmin’s already back to finishing off his tea. 

“They’re faking it,” he says.

Seungmin gives him a look, like he’s far too slow on the uptake.

“Mm, you don’t say.” 

There’s silence at their table for a short time while the two of them finish the last dregs of their respective drinks, Hyunjin’s straw slurping far louder than he’d like it to. Birds pass, clouds drift, winds blow, and then finally, they burst out into laughter. 

“Did you _see_ Minho’s face?” Seungmin cackles. “He totally wasn’t expecting Jisung to follow through!” 

“But when Jisung called Minho babe! You could totally tell he’s been doing it in his dreams for years because that rolled off his tongue way too easily. And the way he started panicking when we said bye!”

“How he reached out a hand for Minho and then took it away? And then reached again but then started waving at us with that same hand? And then stopped waving to throw a peace sign, reached out for Minho’s hand _again_ but stopped to salute us instead? Talk about a panicked gay.”

They’re in absolute stitches all over again, and Hyunjin is thankful they’ve already finished their drinks, or his mint choc chip frappe would’ve been shooting out of his nostrils: a sight he’s sure no one would like to see. 

After continuing to laugh about what’s just happened, Seungmin decides that it’s probably best for them to pretend as if they totally believed the fact that Minho and Jisung are dating. He lists off some convincing reasons for it as well. 

First of all, it’ll help the match-making process because they’ll probably profess their undying love for each other after having to be so close all the time. Kind of like they’ll just have to grow some balls or else it’ll all come spilling out anyway. (This one scares Hyunjin a little, because what if this is what happens to _him_? But it is a good point.) Second of all, outing them might somehow alert the two to the fact that Seungmin and Hyunjin are also fake dating. It’s a little roundabout, and if Hyunjin’s honest he’s not sure that Minho and Jisung combined are smart enough to deduce that, but he gets it. It’s risky, because it highlights that fake dating was something that crossed their minds when observing Minho and Jisung, which therefore makes it possible that him and Seungmin are also fake dating. You know? Not to mention third of all, and most importantly to Seungmin, it is amusing as all hell to watch them suffer. 

Hyunjin is a pure angel who has never done anything wrong in his life, ever, but he has to agree here. Even just the halfhour they were chatting today was beyond hilarious. 

Seungmin has a blank look on his face when Hyunjin comes to from picking crumbs off the plate of cake. His eyes are on Hyunjin’s face, or at least in that general vicinity, but his mind is clearly elsewhere. 

“Minnie, I want more cake,” he whines, just because he wants to see what Seungmin’s reaction is, but he’s surprised when the guy doesn’t even put up half a fuss.

All he does is stand up from his chair and gesture for Hyunjin to have his phone out. 

 

**— private chat: Seungmin ☆彡 & hyunjinyoung**

Seungmin ☆彡: [image]  
Seungmin ☆彡: Choose  
hyunjinyoung: OH MAN   
hyunjinyoung: uhhhhhhhhh  
Seungmin ☆彡: Hurry up!!!!!!!  
Seungmin ☆彡: The man behind me looks scary :(   
hyunjinyoung: RED VELVET!   
Seungmin ☆彡: Aight  
hyunjinyoung: i luv u   
hyunjinyoung: i loooooooooooove u   
Seungmin ☆彡: Shush   
hyunjinyoung: you’re not gonna say it back?  
hyunjinyoung: terrible boyfriend   
Seungmin ☆彡: Fine I love you too whatever   
hyunjinyoung: :’(   
hyunjinyoung: :”(((((((((((((  
Seungmin ☆彡: Hyunjin, I love you 

 

Hyunjin almost drops his phone. Since when is Seungmin so easily swayed into doing as others want? He shakes his head. Seungmin can see him through the glass, he needs to keep himself composed. 

 

hyunjinyoung: see now was that so hard?   
Seungmin ☆彡: Incredibly  
Seungmin ☆彡: Like I said, you’re not easy to love   
Seungmin☆彡: Also you still have crumbs on your face   
hyunjinyoung: TELL ME SOONER WTF   
Seungmin ☆彡: It was cute lmfao   
hyunjinyoung: hurhrrrhuhfijfgghf  
Seungmin ☆彡: I looooove you, boyfieeeeee   
hyunjinyoung: S T O P   
Seungmin ☆彡: Isn’t this what you wanted, baby?   
hyunjinyoung: ur bein a coward say this to my damn face  
Seungmin ☆彡: Ok 

 

Hyunjin sees Seungmin turn around, presumably to get the cake he ordered, and he takes the time to violently scrub at his face so that there’ll be no crumbs on his cheeks when Seungmin comes back outside. 

“Here’s your damn cake,” Seungmin bites, but his actions don’t match up as he places the plate softly in front of Hyunjin. 

Hyunjin, having no self preservation skills and a death wish pending immediate, puts a hand to his ear and awaits the loving words of his fake boyfriend.

“Here’s your damn fucking cake, baby! I love you!” 

Seungmin looks like he’s ready to murder him, but only sits down in his seat with a huff. Hyunjin on the other hand, with his death wish and all, continues to test just how far Seungmin will go. He’s a masochist, he supposes, seeing as he just can’t stop continuously torturing himself.

“Feed me?” 

It’s satisfying to see Seungmin splutter. Not, of course, because Hyunjin likes to see Seungmin in pain (again, he’s a pure angel who has never done anything wrong in his life, ever) but because he’s starting to feel like the only one who’s been flustered about this whole situation and it’s embarrassing. He gets it, Seungmin just doesn’t like him in the same way that Hyunjin does, but regardless, other than being a little jumpy while in the line at the start of the day, he’s been far too chill. 

So chill that Hyunjin gets the message loud and clear: _I just don’t see you that way._

He shivers a little. He never wants to hear those words come out of Seungmin’s mouth, even though he can hear it from his body language. 

He readies himself for cake and opens his mouth, fluttering his eyelashes a little just to make sure that Seungmin knows it’s a joke. He watches as the boy’s cheeks turn pink, and goes to close his mouth and call it off. But instead, Hyunjin finds Seungmin dragging his chair around the table and picking up the fork.

“You’re such a child,” he sighs, taking a decent portion of the cake onto the fork and waiting for Hyunjin to eat off it. “Do you want me to make aeroplane sounds before it lands in your mouth too?” 

Hyunjin snorts.

“That’s not romantic at all, dumbarse.” 


	6. ☀ Jisung ☀

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Real Aussies™ don't celebrate Halloween (that's a lie it's definitely become more popular over the years but like, you just have to live in a Halloween-celebrating pocket in your neighbourhood or it's not a thing) but I wanna gift y'all a chapter so this is an excuse!

` _4th April, 2019_ `

**** The walk is quiet. Jisung is balancing on the side of the footpath with his arms out like it’s a tightrope, and it’s only once he falls off that he finally speaks. 

“So,” he starts. 

It’s strange, he’s so used to talking peoples’ ears off that he can’t understand why he’s so tongue-tied now. It’s a new development, and one that he doesn’t like. 

Minho doesn’t even seem to register that Jisung’s uttered anything, and he sighs. God, he just needs to be normal. 

Normal. 

“Why are you ignoring me?” he whines, jumping onto Minho’s back.

Minho almost falls over and Jisung hops off his back, laughing. 

Normal. 

“Aigoo, you’re so weak, hyung!”

Minho seems to take offence to this, and immediately squats so that Jisung can get back on. He’s grumbling something incomprehensible, but Jisung will take the free ride over having to walk for himself any day. Once he’s snug on Minho’s back, he buries his face in the guy’s neck (the sun is in his eyes otherwise, alright?) and starts humming a tune.

“You’re so light! You’re not eating enough!” Minho scolds him, slapping Jisung’s butt as best he can without dropping him. 

“Me? Light? You almost dropped me before!” 

“You _surprised_ me! I just wasn’t prepared!” 

They laugh down the street until Jisung sits bolt upright, almost causing them to fall over again. 

“Shit! Dude! Turn around!” 

“What?” 

Jisung starts waving his limbs around frantically. 

“We were just on a date. Right? We never ordered anything. We just went to a cafe for a date and left without getting anything from said cafe.” 

There’s a beat of silence. Then, “fuck!”

“Do you think they noticed? They couldn’t have, right?” Jisung tries to calm Minho down. 

“We’re literally up against Seungmin! There’s no way he didn’t notice. We have to go back now,” Minho says. 

Jisung, still on Minho’s back, isn’t able to protest, because as he said, he’s on Minho’s back. So he settles down for an uncomfortable and bumpy ride as Minho runs back to the cafe. He’d give it a solid 0.5/5 stars, except that the guy he’s on is his crush, which automatically makes it a 3.5/5. Not that Jisung is comparing his crush to Uber drivers, because that’s just plain rude of him.

When they arrive back at Bearistas, Minho significantly more winded than Jisung, they find Seungmin feeding Hyunjin cake, and Jisung immediately grabs at Minho’s hair to steer him back around and away from the couple. 

“Wait!” Minho scrambles. “Photo! Photo! We need a photo!” 

Jisung’s glad for his perch on Minho’s back because it means that popped collar or not, the guy can’t see that he’s turning red from embarrassment. He just hates that his first thought upon seeing his friends eating cake is “God, I wish that were me”. He fumbles around for his phone, takes a few shaky shots before he’s finally able to stabilise himself, and gets one really cute photo of Hyunjin’s lips around the fork as Seungmin smiles at him. 

“Perfect. Now let’s get going.” 

It’s kind of strange how Minho never asks Jisung to get off his back, but Jisung takes the ride all the way to the train station, where he’s put down so that he can swipe his train pass. They’re silent again, which Jisung would be fine with, except that his mind is still racing and he needs to spit some words out or he’s going to lose all of his marbles. 

“We’re fake dating,” Minho says into the silence. 

Jisung can’t do anything but confirm. 

“This is exciting! We get to play with our friends and make them all think we’re dating. Then next year on April Fools we can be all “Psych! Fooled ya!” and the looks on their faces will be priceless! This’ll be our best prank yet, Sungie. No one will know what hit them. It’ll be like we’re spies, you know? Operatives on a secret mission.” 

Spies? Now that sounds exciting. 

All of Jisung’s nerves fade away, and he feels everything return to normal. They spend the entire train ride chatting about logistics, and they discuss code names and code words, making the fake dating into a game. Jisung suggests walkie talkies, purely because he’s always wanted to own one, and to his delight, Minho agrees right away. 

Minho misses his stop because they’re so busy scribbling away in Jisung’s notebook, but they shrug and decide to just sleepover at Jisung’s instead.

“We should set boundaries too. I don’t wanna cross any lines with my baby Jisungie.” 

Because Jisung is stupid, he responds with, “there aren’t any lines for you to cross with me, Minho! I’m fine! I trust you.” 

He will come to regret it later, he’s sure of it the moment the words leave his mouth, but it’s too late.

“Well I’m the same for you,” Minho smiles. 

Jisung wants to die. 

But nothing is worse than when it hits 10pm and they decide to hit the hay so that they can peacefully ignore the uni work they need to do by sleeping. 

“We’re dating! We can share the bed. It’ll be good practice, and it’s not like we haven’t done it before. We did it last time I stayed over too, remember? It was 3 in the morning and we were too lazy to get the air mattress out.” 

Jisung would like to amend his previous statement. _Now_ he wants to die. 

They settle in, except this time Jisung isn’t _nearly_ tired enough to be able to ignore the fact that his crush is sleeping right beside him, and it’s even worse this time because he’s completely awake when Minho wraps himself around Jisung and nuzzles into his hair. It’s a little conflicting, because on the one hand this is all he’s ever dreamt of, but on the other hand, well. 

“You’re always so warm,” Minho whispers, disrupting his thoughts.

It makes Jisung’s heart race. Not that it wasn’t already racing, but Jisung thought Minho was already asleep, and that this was all just instinct. You know, people like hugging things in their sleep. It’s a thing. But no, Minho is awake, and conscious, and voluntarily _chose_ to cuddle up to Jisung, and before he knows it, his body is turning of its own accord so that he’s cuddling Minho too. 

That bitch of a traitor. It really be your own body. 

He’s not able to be mad at himself for long, because he falls asleep in seconds, lulled by the steady beats of Minho’s breathing. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh yeah! Before people start questioning why everyone's so loose with their honourifics and all that, I just wanted to say I'm channeling the chill Australian vibes in this fic. They've all been brought up here together since they were small, so the culture's different, you know? Idk if y'all know but we lax as heck and if we're not being rude to each other we ain't friends,,


	7. ★ Seungmin ★

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oof this chapter is dodgy sorry folks.

` _7th April, 2019_ `

**** It all goes to hell in a bucket hat. 

Seungmin should have expected as much from his friends, but he had forgotten to worry about this side of things while being too preoccupied with being all fake lovey dovey with Hyunjin, and doing all the necessary panicking that entails that. So when it comes Sunday and they’re all chilling at Changbin’s house, Seungmin hates to say it but he’s taken by surprise.

“Pay up, brothers and sisters,” Jisung says, sticking out a hand. 

“For what?” Seungmin answers at the same time as Hyunjin. 

Changbin goes ape shit buck wild. He starts yelling accusations at Jisung, which Felix very quickly joins in on, and it’s not until Jeongin tackles them both to the ground screaming at them to shut up that there’s some form of peace. And by peace, Seungmin means the accusations are now being growled lowly, and his ears aren’t dying. 

“We need evidence,” Jeongin says, coolly, because somehow he’s the most level-headed, mature one of the group (excluding Seungmin himself, of course). 

“Oh we have plenty of that,” Minho chuckles, and their group chat suddenly erupts. 

Seungmin sits in silence, not reaching for his phone. He just stares at the carpeted floor of Changbin’s living room while the room turns into chaos around him. Felix’s voice becomes higher and higher with every photo that he looks at, and Changbin has begun pinching Seungmin’s cheeks and cooing at him. Jeongin is a pile of mush on the ground, and there’s the manic laughter of Minho and Jisung to top it all off. 

In amongst all of this, when Seungmin finally raises his head, he makes direct eye contact with Hyunjin. The guy looks lost, but the way his phone is hanging from his hand means he’s seen it all. 

Every single photo that Minho and Jisung had taken of them on Thursday.

“You snakes!” Hyunjin cries. “We thought y’all were on an innocent date but instead you were just there to snoop on us? Why are some of these photos so close up and HD? Wait, why does the first one have leaves in it?” 

The perfect opening to turn this away from their relationship. Seungmin’ll take it.

“You guys weren’t actually on a date, were you. That’s why you never ordered anything.”

“Not true!” Jisung shrieks, accidentally slapping Jeongin to the ground in the process. Without a proper apology, he ploughs through. “Some of us just aren’t rich and privileged enough to afford coffee from cafes like you are!” 

Seungmin counters that if that were the case they shouldn’t have chosen a cafe for a date spot, and Jisung pouts. They continue to argue about the logistics of Minho and Jisung catching Seungmin and Hyunjin on their date, insults thrown around, until Felix finally seems to catch on, rushing to stand on the couch. 

“Wait!” he says, managing to command the room into silence. “Since when are you two dating too?” 

And then, before anyone can say anything else, Hyunjin comes in with an apt, “wait, why don’t they have a betting pool?” Which then brings them back to the start. Minho and Jisung expectantly open their palms and collect money from Changbin, Felix and Jeongin. 

There’s reluctance all around, but they get there eventually.

Following on from that, Seungmin decides it’s a good time to go back to cornering Jisung until he confesses. After much tickling and the joint force of everyone else prodding (Seungmin loves having friends), Jisung caves. 

“Fine! We lied. Our date was to crash your date. We overheard you making plans in the library.” 

“So Jisung,” Seungmin smirks, “riddle me this. On Thursday, where you went on a date with Minho to crash my date, was this in fact your _first_ date with Minho, or your _fourth_ date with Minho?” 

Jisung squeaks, blush crawling up his neck. 

“Fourth,” he replies, dejected. 

“Good boy.” 

Changbin, confused as ever, demands an explanation, and Seungmin is far too happy to deliver, diving straight into the story as Jeongin runs off to make some popcorn. In the corner, Minho comforts Jisung by gently patting his head, and Hyunjin seems to have the time of his life reliving the events of Thursday morning. 

Unfortunately when that’s all over, the questions open up to Seungmin and Hyunjin’s relationship, and Seungmin sighs. They hadn’t discussed anything like that, they weren’t planning on people other than Minho and Jisung being particularly privy of this fact, but he takes the lead. They’re nothing if not adaptable. Spontaneity is but a blip in the road.

They’ve been dating for two months, technically, although it’s kind of hazy when it all started. It was kind of like they confessed, but then they didn’t do anything about it because it was a really busy period with assessment and all. They go on dates every other week, but life’s busy, so they’re not all too fussed about it. Hyunjin contributes every now and again, and thankfully doesn’t ruin anything (perhaps Seungmin should have more faith in him and his intelligence), but what surprises Seungmin the most is when Hyunjin tells their friends that it was Seungmin who confessed first.

“No way!” Changbin yells. “This coward? He would never open his mouth first.”

“Princess Hyunjin has to be wooed, Changbin. This is exactly why you two never worked out.” 

“Yeah, Prince Changbin,” Hyunjin pokes his tongue out.

“Whatever,” Changbin sulks, “I have my own princess now anyway.” 

Felix grins at that, slithering across the carpet to settle down into Changbin’s lap, and Seungmin can’t stop himself from fake gagging at the sight. 

“You mean Court Jester Felix?”

“Don’t be rude!” Felix slaps at Seungmin, but there’s no bite to it.

“I never said I was a Prince either. I am but the lowly Butler Seungmin.” 

It’s an ongoing joke, the whole Princess Hyunjin and Prince Changbin thing. They were all in Year 2, Changbin in Year 3, and there was a competition between the classes of who could hold the best fairy tale performance for the first year kids; an annual thing that their school did. Hyunjin and Changbin were in Class D of their respective grades, so they had gotten together to do Cinderella. Seungmin and Jisung were in Class A, who chose to do Little Red Riding Hood, but that’s less important.

Changbin had been the first to sign himself up to play the prince. It’s an age where everyone’s concerned about cooties, so no one else had put their hand up. Most of the guys were only interested if the girl they had a “crush” on was playing Cinderella, so he’d gotten the role straight away. All of the girls were too scared to be the princess next to Changbin because they all thought he looked scary, which caused Changbin to start crying (although he always denies this part of the story). Hyunjin, not understanding why the girls were so terrified, immediately filled the spot of Cinderella, and thus Princess Hyunjin and Prince Changbin was born. 

Jeongin says he still very clearly remembers 2D and 3D’s play. After all, how could one ever forget Hyunjin in a flowing blue dress? But he’s only ever told Seungmin that 2A and 3A’s Little Red Riding Hood was his favourite play that year. 

“You guys make me feel so excluded,” Minho complains, “always talking about your childhood that I wasn’t a part of.” 

“What are _you_ complaining about?” Changbin laughs. “We literally all went to the same primary school. And high school. Felix should be the one complaining, he only came in Year 8.” 

“Yeah, but you kids are all so young! I’m an old hag, I performed for you three. The Little Mermaid and Hansel and Gretel.” 

He points at Hyunjin, Seungmin and Changbin, who all stifle laughs. 

“You’re forgetting your boyfriend, arsehole. You performed for me too,” Jisung elbows Minho. “And I remember it distinctly. You were _great_ as an apple tree, angel cakes.” 

The conversation disperses from that, and it’s when they’ve settled down to watch a movie that Jeongin finally says what’s been plaguing him all day. 

“Why am I the only one who’s alone?” 

Felix giggles, much to Jeongin’s dismay, but what’s worse is when Hyunjin leans over to ruffle his hair. 

“You’re too young for love, Jeonginnie,” he smiles. 

No one brings up the fact that Felix and Changbin have been dating since high school. 


	8. ☾ Minho ☾

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So anyway let's celebrate the award SKZ won with another chapter because I just want excuses to post more than once a week 
> 
> Sorry for any mistakes because I'm too lazy to proofread today!

` _12th April, 2019_ `

**** It’s hard. 

Is that what everyone wanted to hear Minho say? Is that what everyone was waiting for him to admit? Sure, he was the one who suggested they make the whole fake dating thing into a game to make things simpler, but even so, Minho can feel his insides coiling. 

He throws himself into his uni work, concerning staff by continuously booking the studios at absurd times. It only takes him a week to burn out, but Minho feels like he needed it. 

Him and Jisung, they’re soulmates. 

Minho knows that, he’s known since they were kids. Maybe not immediately, because he was too concerned with laughing at the snot coming out of Jisung’s nose, but they’re soulmates. 

The problem is, soulmates… they don’t necessarily mean that you’ll be madly in love until the end of time. There are different types of soulmates, you know? And Minho can’t stop himself from thinking that maybe him and Jisung are just friend soulmates. They are best friends, after all. 

But it’s a lot harder to keep thinking that, recently. All this fake dating is playing with his mind, and it hurts because it’s giving him false hope. 

Minho hits the ground. 

Crap, he was so lost in thought he almost forgot his body was still dancing. He pulls himself up tentatively, and after realising he’s safe and he’ll only come out of this with a bruise, he runs over to the camera. Now that he's fallen, it's as good a time as any playback the footage and study every movement he's made.

He presses rewind, and he can see it in his face the moment his mind starts to wander. He hates that he moves better when he’s thinking about Jisung. His movements are more fluid, his extensions reach further, his lines cleaner, his leaps higher, his barrel roll… 

Minho snorts at himself. He didn’t even fall in the same momentum of the turn, it looks more like he hit an invisible wall mid-spin and came crashing down in a straight line. It’s almost comical to watch. He plays the scene over and over, slowly losing his mind as he laughs harder and harder. Step, spin, arms out, lift off, tur- splat. Step, spin, arms out, lift off, tur- splat. Step, spin, arms out, lift off, tur- splat.

He rewinds the video back to the start. 

He hates that he moves better when he’s thinking about Jisung, because he shouldn’t. 

He hates it because when every ounce of his concentration is poured into the dance, he never looks as good.

It’s Sunday. He’s bone tired, one foot lazily hung up on the barre, camera abandoned next to him. He’s staring at himself in the mirror, watching beads of sweat run towards the ground and pool beside his face. It’s only 10:12. He has 48 minutes left in the room before he needs to go home. He has Monday classes, and as much as he’s trying to distract himself with dancing, he’s not set out to kill himself.

Minho hears his phone ring, and he lets his leg fall off the barre. He doesn’t bother picking himself up, just hauls his unceremonious heap of a body across the floor to his phone, just in case it’s his mother calling to nag at him. He assumes it is, since no one calls people in this day and age.

Not in this economy, unless you’re Seo Changbin and “but feelings are so _hard_ over text how are you going to _feel_ my _emotions_? The pure _artistry_ of my day to day vernacular strung into sentences is something that should _only_ be experienced _aurally_ unless you have an excuse! Like if you’re deaf! Or I’m sick!” 

He doesn’t bother checking the name when he picks up.

“Minho! Are you still at uni? Wanna go on a date?” 

His breath catches in his throat.

“What?” 

“Well Hyunjinnie said you booked out the studio late at night all week. Which is not good for your health, by the way, so you should probably stop doing that. Anyway, I really wanted chicken, but everywhere in the city is already closed and the next closest place that’s open until 11 is here so I’m on campus. So, date?” 

“Uh, sure. I’m sweaty though.” 

“Ooh, hot. You know I love my boys steamy.” 

“Gross, shut your mouth.” 

“You sure you don’t want it wide open?” 

God, Minho hates how easy everything is with Jisung. 

“Mind out of the gutter, mister! How are you going to find a nice girl to make you an honest man like that?” 

“Why would I need a nice girl if I’ve got you?”

Minho chokes.

“Gimme ten, I need to pack up and I’ll come on out.”

“Okay, I’ll just get us drinks first. Large Wintermelon, cheese foam, grape jelly, rainbow jelly, pearls, right?” 

Minho laughs, because he can hear Jisung shivering over his regular order. It’s a good combination, alright? Everyone is just too scared to step out of their comfort zones. 

“Yeah, thanks baby. Love you.” 

He hangs up immediately. The words just slipped out of his mouth. The only reason he’s not a pile of goo is because even before fake dating they used to say things like this all the time, jokingly. 

Except sometimes Minho wasn’t joking. 

It’s fine, Jisung won’t take it too hard. It’s just how they always are. It is just how they always are. It’s just how they always are. _God_ , it doesn’t sound convincing at all. But hey, Minho can just pass it off as practicing. They’re secret operatives, not two university students trying to fool their friends. And secret operatives are always at work, even if they don’t have an audience. 

It’s the key to a convincing performance. 

 

☾ ☾ ☾

 

**— private chat: Jisungus Bungus & Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ**

Jisungus Bungus: wots taking u so long   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : whats*  
Jisungus Bungus: actually its what’s   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : it’s*  
Jisungus Bungus: NO SERIOUSLY THO   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : chillax bro   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : i just took a quick shower coz disG OSti ng   
Jisungus Bungus: u kno ilu anyway   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : i’m coming   
Jisungus Bungus: o o f   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : MIND O U T THE GUTTER BITCH  
Jisungus Bungus: sorry  
Jisungus Bungus: i’m at boba king rn just outside   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : oight   
Jisungus Bungus: aight*  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : OIGHT   
Jisungus Bungus: it’s aight  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : O I G H T 

 

☾ ☾ ☾

 

“Hey, you weren’t waiting long, were you?” Minho says, a little out of breath after running the whole way down the hill. 

“Not at all babe, I only just got here.”

Minho laughs. 

“Lies, you’ve waited almost half an hour.” 

“Time is nothing if it’s for you,” Jisung flutters his eyelashes up at Minho. “Now come on, I want my chicken and they’ll close soon if we don’t hurry up.”

 

Minho is in love with Jisung. 

It’s hard. 


	9. ☁ Hyunjin ☁

` _9th May, 2019_ `

**— group chat: he was a sk7er boy, she said see you l7er boy**

flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: Wyd?  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : ew  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : what am i, on grindr?  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: I just wanted to ask if anyone was free :(  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: N now I’m being  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: A T T A C K E D  
hyunjinyoung: then i suggest not texting like a fuckboi js  
Jisungus Bungus: who’s free? i’m on the quad  
Seungmin ☆彡: That, Felix, which you see above, is an exemplary model of how to check if your friends are free  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: Got it  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: Who’s free? I’m on the quad  
Jisungus Bungus: COPYRIGHT  
Jisungus Bungus: YOU JUST USED MY WORDS WITHOUT CREDITING ME  
changbeanie♥flex: STOP ATTACKING MY BOYFRIEND  
Jeong is IN: SHUT UP I’M IN CLASS  
Jisungus Bungus: sorry jeongin baby we luv u  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : uh? learn to mute the chat bih  
Jeong is IN: Y’all-  
Seungmin ☆彡: It’s alright guys we can just move to the other group chat  
Seungmin ☆彡: You know, the one that we have without Jeongin  
Jeong is IN: Y-  
Jeong is IN: You guys have a g-group chat without me?  
hyunjinyoung: no lmfao  
hyunjinyoung: we’ll make one now if you want us to though  
Jeong is IN: No  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : oof speedy someones desperado  
Jeong is IN: No it’s ok the teacher’s not looking rn so I can put you guys on silent  
Seungmin ☆彡: desperado  
changbeanie♥flex: desperado  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: desperado  
hyunjinyoung: desperado  
Jeong is IN: desperado  
Jisungus Bungus: sittin in a old monte carlo  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : what did i do to deserve this kind of hate  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : ur all  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : CYBERBULLIES  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: Who’s free? I’m on the quad  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : ARE YOU GONNA IGNORE MY PLIGHT  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: There was a deal on pizza so I bought 4 boxes and I’m just sitting here by myself  
Seungmin ☆彡: Tempting but it’s my day off sorry  
Jisungus Bungus: ughhhhekrjhg my tute starts in 10 big rip  
hyunjinyoung: I’M NYOOMING IN  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : …ur the only non bully in here i’m omw  
changbeanie♥flex: I’m about to start my shift :’(  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: Well see u soon hyunjin and minho!  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: I’ll save u some binnie :)  
changbeanie♥flex: I love you  
changbeanie♥flex: I am in love you  
changbeanie♥flex: You are the light of my life  
changbeanie♥flex: I would die for you  
changbeanie♥flex: I would die without you  
Seungmin ☆彡: Yes, yes wherefore art thou Romeo we get it shut up  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: I love you too!

 

Hyunjin locks his phone, speeding towards the quad. Like any other broke college student, he’s a sucker for free food, and he’ll take it in whatever form it comes. As for Hyunjin’s personal preference, he likes his free food in the order of 1. burritos, 2. fried chicken, 3. pizza, 4. sushi and 5. ramen, but he’s not particularly picky. It’s free, after all. 

“Yo, Felix!” he yells, waving an arm over his head. 

His friend is sitting against a tree when he finds him, dozing off with 4 boxes of pizza in his lap. When Hyunjin walks over, he moves to close Felix’s mouth first, because flies like like coming into unwelcome spaces (read: _mouths_ , Hyunjin cannot gather the strength to relay how many flies he’s had oh so graciously let themselves in uninvited while he had his mouth open), and the boy snaps awake. 

“Hey, how goes it?” Felix mumbles, rubbing at his eyes. 

“Great, because you’re offering free pizza. I’ll shout you something another time.”

“Nah, you’re good. What’d you come from?” 

“Entertainment Project Management. Or EntProjMan, as I like to say. Absolute hell. Don’t take it.”

“Noted,” Felix says, opening up the first box of pizza. “This one’s half Meat Lovers, half Supreme. Go for it.” 

Hyunjin’s words of thanks are completely muffled because he takes no time in shoving food into his face, but Felix gives him a smile like he’s understood the garble that came out of his mouth, so everything’s alright. There’s no judgement, because in seconds Felix is doing exactly the same, and no one can judge _them_ either, because growing teenage boys need their food. It’s a fact of life.

The greasier and unhealthier the food the better, but that’s what the textbooks won’t tell you. 

“So you and Seungmin, huh?” Felix asks once they’re through the initial stage of raw, uninhibited hunger (which is conquered after three slices). 

He’s wiggling his eyebrows, as he always seems to when they get into “suggestive topics”, and Hyunjin rolls his eyes. 

“Don’t give me that, I know you saw it coming. You placed bets on us.” 

“Fuck, we sure did, buddy.” 

“How did you guys know, anyway? Was I really that obvious?”

“Was I really that obvious?” Felix mocks him. “Nah though, you literally follow him around like a lost puppy.” 

“You do that to Changbin too!” 

“And he’s the one you cuddle the most, after Changbin. He’s always your first preference for cuddles too. Once Seungmin rejects you, then you go to someone else. But that’s only if you’re not seated. Then it’s whoever’s closest. We all love your cuddles, but you just weren’t all that good at distributing them, you know.”

Hyunjin is floored by that. He had a mental calendar of sorts tallying things up so that people wouldn’t catch on. So maybe he didn’t count some of his cuddles with Seungmin because he thought they were too short and didn’t deserve a point, but he’d kept count! And still it had failed him. Maybe next time he’ll make a physical calendar to keep track.

“Also in Year 10 when we had to write a song in music, yours was definitely about Seungmin. But that’s not all, you know? It’s not just you. Seungmin always-“

Of course, this has to be the exact moment that Minho makes it to the quad. Hyunjin’s heart rate is killed instantly with the guy’s arrival, and he snatches another slice of pizza out of the box in irritation, this one a double Margherita cheese with a cheese-stuffed crust. 

The moment is gone, the sentence is gone, Hyunjin’s patience for Minho is gone, God is gone, all hope is gone, happiness is gone, the world is a wretched, dark and gloomy place-

“Bruh, your cheese’ll hit the ground if you keep holding your pizza like that.” 

Minho. 

“I’ll kill you in your sleep,” Hyunjin grumbles. 

“What did I ever do to you?” Minho startles. “Wait, is this about placing bets on you? Or is it about stalking you to your date to take photos? Or is it about showing all of those photos to our friends?” 

“How about all of the above?” Felix whispers. 

Felix is right. It’s all of the above. 

With that, it’s settled for Hyunjin. He no longer wants to play Cupid for Minho and Jisung. He’s going to dedicate every second of his life to exposing their fake relationship. 


	10. ☀ Jisung ☀

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Henlo,, I'm going to go see the Teatro alla Scala today and I'm super excited so in that spirit, here's another chapter~

` _10th May, 2019_ `

**** Inevitably, Jisung bursts. 

It’s not much of a surprise that he can’t keep it up for long because he’s always been a little bit of a blabbermouth, but it takes a lot more of a toll on him than he expected it to. Thinking of it as a game or not, Jisung needs someone to confide in about his fake dating. 

(Perhaps this is why he would never really be able to make it as a secret operative: he always needs a confidant, and solitude isn’t something he handles well.) 

He bemoans the fact that it can’t be Seungmin. The guy would easily be his first choice, if it weren’t for the fact that he would gloat for three weeks before being helpful. Yes, Jisung trusts him in serious cases such as these, Seungmin isn’t a _complete_ snake ~~(a debatable statement)~~ , but he’s already been on Jisung’s tail from the get-go; the consequences of opening up to him now would be huge. 

With that route in the rubbish bin, Jisung is back to square one. 

He considers his options very carefully.

 

☀ ☀ ☀

 

**— private chat: Jisungus Bungus & flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ**

Jisungus Bungus: open the door  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: ?  
Jisungus Bungus: i’m out front on your veranda?  
Jisungus Bungus: open the door!  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: <https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VVggXZPCuYw>

 

Jisung clicks the link before the preview can load, and almost staggers backwards, having forgotten how loud his volume was. This is why he hates the fact that he likes soft music. Curse his sentimental heart. When you play something loud afterwards, it’s _loud_. 

He’s filled with instant regret, but ploughs through the fact to start banging on Felix’s door — screw being respectful to the rest of the Lee family when Felix just did _that_ to his ears. 

Luckily for Jisung, the rest of the Lee family is out. They’ve run off to a post-dinner movie night, some movie that Felix’s little sister was dying to see but Felix couldn’t join in on because he’s soft-grounded. 

Jisung doesn’t particularly know what soft-grounded means (it means Felix abandoned doing the dishes to play video games too many times in one week and is banned from family fun for a month — this as opposed to hard-grounded, which he thankfully graduated from when he came out of high school, because he’s now a #ResponibleAdult and is trusted to make his own judgements on things that used to get him hard-grounded), but in this moment, he’s grateful for it.

Felix lets him in without much of a protest, too used to his friends turning up uninvited. More times than not, said friend is Jisung, as is the case right now, but Jisung is not as sheepish about it as he probably should be.

“Come on, take a seat in The Chair,” he says as he leads Jisung into his room by the hand.

Jisung’s not really in the mood for one of Felix’s massages today, but the moment his friend’s hands are on his shoulders, that thought melts away. 

“Dude,” Felix gives a low, amused chuckle, “what have you been _thinking_ about? You’re as tight as an Olympic gymnast.”

Jisung gives his response some thought.

“How did you and Changbin get together?” 

“That’s what’s got you in knots?” 

“Tell me.” 

It’s not a thrilling story, is what Felix likes to say, but he delves in anyway.

Jisung was the one who introduced the two. He’s well aware of this, obviously, but he had no idea how much of an impact it had had. They were in the same home room on the first day of school, and Jisung was telling Felix about his friends that he’d get to meet at morning tea.

“You’re kidding. You were already whipped from there?” 

“Shush.” 

Anyway, as the story goes, because Jisung came up through the grades from JYP Primary, he was already familiar with the school grounds, so he spent the first ten minutes giving Felix a quick tour, just to familiarise him. This is a really important factor, because it means that by the time Felix meets Jisung’s friends, they’re already at the height of… fun, Felix will name it. 

When Felix arrives, Changbin is testing out some new rap lyrics he made over the holidays, and it’s kind of love at first sight. The guy before him is so cool, and his rapping skills are off the charts, and he looks so cool, and his rapping is so cool, and his voice is so cool, and- 

Well, as one can deduce, Felix has never been the best at English. Unlike Seungmin, he’s not a walking thesaurus. 

Fast forward the awkward introductions and Felix embarrassing himself and all of that jazz that he doesn’t want to recount, and Felix will safely say his best friend is Jisung (Jisung hides a little bit of a proud blush), but there’s someone he wishes he was a little closer to. 

He’s had these sorts of friend crushes over the years, but this is the first time he’s actually been able to be friends with said friend crush, so it’s an exciting new development for him. 

“You didn’t know you were gay?” 

“You didn’t know you were gay either!” 

“I am _pansexual_ excuse you, this is pan _erasure_.” 

In any case, once Felix realises that his friend crushes were never friend crushes and real crushes, it doesn’t take him long to get his shit together. He has a few days of being really strange where everyone is worried about him, but when he comes out the other side he feels better, stronger. Like he knows who he is. In that new light, he marches straight up to Changbin’s locker Monday morning and confesses.

Changbin, in his shock at hearing the confession, accidentally opens his locker door with too much force and smacks it into Felix’s face. Then, in a panic, he drops his books on Felix’s foot, and _then_ the rest is history. 

It’s a story Jisung’s heard before, hell, he was a part of it, but there’s something about hearing Felix tell it that’s relaxing, like it confirms that everything in life comes together eventually, you just need to be patient. Jisung falls asleep right before Felix actually reaches the part where he confesses, but Felix, who doesn’t notice that his friend has fallen asleep, keeps going until the end. 

Felix laughs when Jisung’s head lolls forward, and he gently pinches Jisung’s nose until the boy startles awake. 

Jisung gives Felix a soft “thanks, man,” after he gets over his initial fright, and rubs the sleep out of his eyes as he trudges out of the house. He doesn’t spill any beans on the whole Minho fiasco in the end, but somehow he feels just as contented as if he had. 

He feels light, walking home. Like things’ll be alright.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You are more than welcome to click the link that Felix sent!


	11. ★ Seungmin ★

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> n e ways,,, i'm really hoping that by this point you guys haven't realised that i don't really read text fics and am kind of lost???

` _10th May, 2019_ `

**** Hyunjin is out of breath when Seungmin opens the door. He’s all sweaty, hair a matted mess atop his head, and he collapses straight into Seungmin’s arms, much to his dismay — he would rather not be drenched in someone else’s sweat. 

“What brings you to my humble abode?” Seungmin says slowly. He’s a little worried, considering the last time Hyunjin did something like this, his puppy had run away while his folks were out of town for the weekend, and he was a panicked mess because his phone was out of batteries. 

“Not much, missed the bus but wanted to catch you while I was still on my creative high, so I ran all the way here.” 

Seungmin thinks Hyunjin is out of his mind. 

But it doesn’t say much, because Hyunjin is basically always out of his mind. 

Seungmin drags Hyunjin inside, sets him down on the sofa and chucks him a towel to wipe himself dry with. For good measure, he throws a can of deodorant at Hyunjin’s head too. The boy takes a few minutes to compose himself, and by the time he’s dry and ready to talk, Seungmin’s brought out some snacks from the kitchen. 

“I have a new plan,” Hyunjin starts, digging into the chips. “We’re not trying to get Minho and Jisung together anymore.” 

This perks Seungmin up. 

“We’re not?” 

“No, that bastard doesn’t deserve it, son of a bitch.” 

“Which bastard son of a bitch?” 

“Minho.” 

Seungmin nods in understanding.

Hyunjin then dives into a retelling of yesterday’s events that he had been mulling over. Seungmin doesn’t quite understand the details of what Minho had done to trigger Hyunjin into this revenge-seeking demon, but he’s not about to complain. He can only assume it had something to do with the last slice of free pizza, considering it’s Hyunjin, the same boy who didn’t speak to Seungmin for a whole day in Prep when he helped himself to half of a packet of his M&Ms. 

“We have to expose them,” Hyunjin says with bite. “No more match-making, no more Cupid. Full out Minho-and-Jisung-in-a-bush-ing; turning their strategies on them. You know, the whole staking out to spy on them and collecting evidence thing. “

Seungmin likes the sound of it well enough. It’ll be funny, too. Minho and Jisung play a pretty convincing couple when they’re not panicking, so he doesn’t doubt that the rest of their friends will be in shock. The two like each other anyway, it’s clear as day, so maybe exposing the fake relationship will lead to them having a real relationship. It checks out in his mind. Minho doesn’t like being one-upped, so he’ll probably confess right on the spot to Jisung to save his arse from teasing, proclaiming something stupid like it was the only way he could think of that would make Jisung date him. 

“I’m in, dude.” 

Hyunjin smiles.  

 

★ ★ ★

 

**— group chat: he was a sk7er boy, she said see you l7er boy**

Seungmin ☆彡: Who’s free Saturday?  
Seungmin ☆彡: I wanna check out the new arcade   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : i don’t play with losers sry   
hyunjinyoung: you lost ddr last time?   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : evryone knows real dancers can’t play ddr for shit   
Seungmin ☆彡: Hyunjin got high score though   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : JISUNG THEY’RE BEING MEAN   
Jisungus Bungus: don’t pay them any mind, angel cakes   
Jisungus Bungus: we have a date on saturday anyway we can’t go   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : u right bitch  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : we do  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: OOOOOOOOOOOH  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: A DATE  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: Where y’all going  
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : uh? why would we tell u?   
Jisungus Bungus: the museum!   
Jisungus Bungus: gonna look at the dinosaurs   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : uH? WHY WOULD U TELL THEM?   
changbeanie♥flex: Been there done that   
hyunjinyoung: not everyone is in a cute relationship like you, changbin  
changbeanie♥flex: You’re literally dating Seungmin   
hyunjinyoung: yeah but it’s recent?  
changbeanie♥flex: I’m not stopping you from going to the museum too?   
Seungmin ☆彡: What this illiterate fuck is trying to say is not everyone in this gc is a high school sweetheart who has it alllike you are  
hyunjinyoung: I’M NOT AN ILLITERATE FUCK   
Seungmin ☆彡: Ye you are  
Seungmin ☆彡: But you’re my illiterate fuck ♥

**Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ changed hyunjinyoung’s nickname to: illiterate fuck ♥**

illiterate fuck ♥: OI   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : u don’t love jinyoung anymore anyway   
illiterate fuck ♥: sayS WHOMST?   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : ur in a loving relationship now   
illiterate fuck ♥: it is park jinyoung first and foremost in this house A L W A Y S   
Jeong is IN: STOP FIGHTING WHY ARE YOU GUYS ALWAYS FIGHTING   
Seungmin ☆彡: We know, we know,  
Seungmin ☆彡: That’s why you serenaded me with one of his songs last night   
illiterate fuck ♥: DON’T EXPOSE ME   
Jeong is IN: STOP FIGHTING   
Seungmin ☆彡: N e ways,,,  
Seungmin ☆彡: Who’s free Saturday to go to the arcade   
Jeong is IN: Me!   
Seungmin ☆彡: *blushes*  
Seungmin ☆彡: Is this a date with Jeonginnie?   
illiterate fuck ♥: YOU HAVE A BOYFRIEND   
Seungmin ☆彡: A boyfriend who I know is not free   
illiterate fuck ♥: SO YOU’RE CHEATING ON ME?   
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: I’ll come!!!!!  
changbeanie♥flex: Hard pass  
changbeanie♥flex: Sick of being smashed by Seungmin 

**Seungmin ☆彡 changed changbeanie♥flex’s nickname to: soreloser♥flex**

soreloser♥flex: I’ll take it   
soreloser♥flex: It just be like that in this bitch of a world   
soreloser♥flex: Sometimes people aren’t strong enough to stand up again after the universe keeps beating them down  
Seungmin ☆彡: W e a k 

**soreloser♥flex changed Seungmin ☆彡’s nickname to: Satan ☆彡**

Jeong is IN: I knew it would only take a matter of seconds for this chat to fall to pieces again  
Jeong is IN: What happened to being respectful and keeping our own usernames   
illiterate fuck ♥: yeah what happened to that, MINHO   
Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ : ib r e a t h e d  
Satan ☆彡: Well take your breathing elsewhere you’re contaminating my air 

**Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ changed Minho (❀･ω･)ﾉ’s nickname to: Minho (❀x.x)ᕗ**

soreloser♥flex: What are you doing changing your own name defeats the purpose of life  
soreloser♥flex: It’s against the rules  
soreloser♥flex:Suffer with the rest of us

**illiterate fuck ♥ changed Minho (❀x.x)ᕗ’s nickname to: bastard son of a bitch**

Satan ☆彡: LMFAO   
bastard son of a bitch: i-  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: It’s what you deserve oop  
Satan ☆彡: TELL EM 

 

Seungmin puts his phone down. 

“Well that was a lot easier than I expected it to be. But it’s settled then, hey. You’ve got a date to crash and collect evidence, while I keep everyone else distracted and off your tail.” 

Hyunjin grins, a big toothy one. 

“They’ll never know what hit them.”


	12. ☾ Minho ☾

`_11th May, 2019_ `

It’s a real date. Well, as real as a date can be when the relationship is fake. Minho had thanked Jisung for getting them out of going to the arcade with Seungmin (perhaps it was him that was the true sore loser, not Changbin), and using a date as an excuse was frankly genius.

How could anyone think they’re not actually in a relationship if they’re going on dates on the weekend, right?

The only problem being, Jisung told their friends what they were going to do on the date, which means that they have to actually go on said date now, because Minho knows his friends, and they’re probably all going to skip the arcade just to check on them. Especially if Seungmin’s in the lead. Which he is, so.

“We can’t just chill at one of our houses?” Jisung asks; a poor, naïve little boy.

“No! They’ll find us out and interrogate us, then we’ll have Seungmin cornering as _again_. We can’t risk that! He knew us being at that cafe wasn’t a real date, which means if we don’t go on this one, he’ll realise that this whole dating thing isn’t even real to begin with! Smart people are just _like_  that! We need to cover our bases.”

Minho doesn’t know why he’s being so adamant about it all. Looking back at this moment he’ll see it’s because he really wanted to go on a date with Jisung, but current-Minho is pretty sure he’s just trying to save his arse. As the oldest of the group, he’s never in the mood to be the butt of a joke; he’ll do whatever it takes to avoid it.

“You’re right,” Jisung says, after some consideration. “Alright, let’s do this. Saturday.”

“Saturday,” Minho echoes.

 

☾ ☾ ☾

 

Minho likes looking good. It’s just a fact of life, nothing big, nothing small. On a date however, Minho is not satisfied with just looking good. It doesn’t matter if this date is fake, real, hypothetical, in his dreams, he needs to be looking absolutely stunning. Breathtaking, if you will.

But nothing is working.

First of all, The Jeans are in the wash, shorts are absolutely out of the question because this is a _date_  (also the museum is kind of cold and Minho’s not about to be walking around with goosebumps), all of his shirts are somehow wrinkly, and he only has two hours to put himself together before heading out.

God, he should have woken up earlier.

Alas, here he is, gambling upon whether or not his bus will come on time for him to make it to the train station, and seeing if he can try his luck with The Jeans being washed and dry before he dashes out of the house. It ends up being a gamble he takes, which pays off (for the first time in his life, he’s so used to being screwed over by public transport) and he makes it to the bus stop right as the bus comes into the curb.

He spends the whole trip in a sweat, but it’s alright because Minho is a gentleman that carries a hand towel and handkerchief with him at all times.

When he arrives at the museum he notes that Jisung isn’t there yet. Fashionably late, he supposes, although Minho has the better sense of style out of the two of them.

It doesn’t take long for Jisung to arrive, but when he does he’s panting a little and his face is all red.

“Minho!” he shouts, waving his arm erratically.

It’s only until the guy makes his way to Minho’s side that he registers how amazing he looks today.

It’s a cute outfit, one that Minho wouldn’t have considered for a date at their age, but he supposes Jisung is dressed more appropriately, like he’s channeling a young energy for an enjoyable time reliving their childhoods at the museum. He’s in overalls that stop just above his bruised knees (Minho wouldn’t be surprised if they’re from Jisung falling over in the train), he has a bright yellow bandana wrapped around his neck, and a denim cap that matches his overalls. Not to mention his mismatched socks that Minho recognises as being Christmas presents from the last two years.

“You look great, Jisungie,” Minho smiles. “You smell amazing too!”

He doesn’t know what made him tack that one on. God, someone shut him up.

“Thanks! I stole my dad’s cologne. He always saves it for anniversaries, so I was curious. Worth it, ‘cause it smells great!”

Minho laughs. Typical Jisung.

“Come on, _baby_. Let’s go,” he says, linking arms with the boy.

“Sure thing, my angel cakes.”

It’s a date.

 

☾ ☾ ☾

 

The museum is nice. It really is a trip down memory lane, and they have a blast being little kids again. Sure, the kids think it’s weird that two /grandpas/ are doing the same things as them and having fun, but Jisung has a way with children, and they end up making new friends. They’re not ones Minho can say he can cherish for life, but they’re cute, and they’re not as mean as his real friends, so he likes their companionship even though they can only count to 100 and they don’t understand Minho’s taste in music.

They go out for a late lunch once they’ve made their way through the museum, looking for somewhere nice enough to be able to boast about later when they’re telling their friends how great their date was, but still cheap enough that their wallets won’t be significantly lighter after paying the bill.  
  
As they’re walking down the street, hand in hand because Minho is pretty sure Jisung will run off without him otherwise, they spot Hyunjin across the road.

Jisung immediately calls out to Hyunjin who looks over at them and waves, but Minho is having none of his friendly bullshit.

 

**— private chat: bastard son of a bitch & illiterate fuck ♥**

bastard son of a bitch: yo what ru doing here?  
illiterate fuck ♥: spying on y’all lmfao  
bastard son of a bitch: fr?  
bastard son of a bitch: I FUCKIN KNEW IT  
bastard son of a bitch: CALLED IT  
bastard son of a bitch: KNEW IT WAS SUSPICIOUS YOU WERE TOO BUSY TO GO TO THE ARCADE WITH YOUR BOYF  
illiterate fuck ♥: jesus christ  
illiterate fuck ♥: i’m joking?????  
illiterate fuck ♥: i’m running errands lol  
bastard son of a bitch: what kind of a-  
illiterate fuck ♥: it’s what good sons do  
illiterate fuck ♥: i know you wouldn’t know  
bastard son of a bitch: H-  
illiterate fuck ♥: they only have this one specific brand of agar powder here  
bastard son of a bitch: ……………  
bastard son of a bitch: ……suspicious……  
illiterate fuck ♥: yeah ofc you wouldn’t believe me  
illiterate fuck ♥: you can’t cook for shit so you wouldn’t know  
bastard son of a bitch: y am i always being attacked  
illiterate fuck ♥: cause you were made to be insulted <3  
bastard son of a bitch: get fucked   
bastard son of a bitch: ur ruining my date  
illiterate fuck ♥: byeeeeee

 

Minho watches very carefully as Hyunjin waves them off to walk into an Asian mart, and he settles. It seems Hyunjin really was telling the truth.

Jisung tugs at his hand, and he turns around.

“Can we get ice cream?”


	13. ☁ Hyunjin ☁

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> idk if y'all can tell but i posted the last chapter by accident but hey on that roll have another one?

` _11th May, 2019_ `

Hyunjin wakes up unmotivated. He knows it was his own plan, and he felt really confident about it up until yesterday, but it’s like… pre-shit-storm-depression (as opposed to something such as post-concert-depression, which is an actual term, but Hyunjin’s the new-generation Shakespeare or whatever, making up words and stuff). He just has this terrible niggling feeling that something’s going to go wrong, and on top of that, he’s got zero back up. 

Even worse than that, actually, is the fact that he’s got zero back up _because_ everyone will be out having fun at the arcade, which he’s purposefully missing out on, just to go stalk Minho and Jisung on a date.

Jesus, he needs to get his priorities in check. 

For a second, Hyunjin contemplates inviting Changbin. The guy opted out of going to the arcade, but he said it was because he didn’t want to lose to Seungmin, which could possibly mean that he’s still free. But then he realises that to bring Changbin along, he has to let the boy in on his plan, which is not optimal, because he’s trying to keep this operation under wraps. 

Telling Changbin equals telling Felix, and telling Felix equals telling the whole world. 

(God bless that guy’s soul. You really want to trust him with your secrets, but he always seems to let them slip by accident. At least it’s more than Hyunjin can say for some of his other friends, like bastard son of a bitch, who’ll spill the tea in -0.3 seconds for the thrill of the ride.)

Anyway, back on task.

The other problem with Hyunjin’s brilliant new plan, is that he has almost no details on this date. He’s riding on the fact that it’s this Saturday, it’s at the museum (he praises the Lord that there’s only one museum with dinosaurs in this Godforsaken city), and because Minho and Jisung both like to sleep in (so does he, but these are the sacrifices he makes for revenge), they couldn’t have scheduled it all that early. 

Hyunjin levels that while arriving at the museum at 10 would be the safest option, he loves his sleep, and he also struggles waking up, so he opts for a scandalous 11am instead. It’s risky, but a risky that he’s willing to bargain for in the name of beauty sleep. So at 9:45 he opens his eyes and drags himself out of bed. 

He makes sure to dress down, something lowkey without too many colours, and adds a trusty bucket hat to his outfit for good measure. It’s handy for covering his features _and_ it’s stylish, so Hyunjin really can’t lose in wearing it. He grabs his favourite pair of sunnies off his bedside table for a trusty companion in his endeavour (the weather says 31°, clear skies and a 0% chance of rain), and sets out of the house. 

The trip to the museum is wholly uneventful, and because Hyunjin is a risk-taking, rebellious teenager, he hops off one stop early and walks the extra way to the museum. 

To his surprise, when he arrives at the museum Minho is already standing around and waiting for Jisung, and Hyunjin smirks when he realises the guy is wearing his Date Jeans. But then he realises that he’s supposed to be out exposing them for fake dating, and he frowns. Minho’s Date Jeans work against his argument. This isn’t good. 

He grabs a few snaps of Minho standing around because if he doesn’t he’ll get bored, and then moves on to taking selfies while he waits for Jisung to show up. 

He almost snorts when Jisung makes his appearance, because it kind of looks like Minho is there to babysit Jisung, but his amusement fades when he sees that literally nothing they’re doing is supporting his very real, true statement (these are _not_ alternative facts) that Minho and Jisung are in a fake relationship. 

He does however take note of the fact that Jisung doesn’t compliment Minho back. 

As he watches the two enter the museum, Hyunjin sighs. He takes off his bucket hat to scrunch up his hair in frustration before calming down and putting the bucket hat back on top of his now mess of a head. 

“Angel cakes” is a new pet name that Jisung hadn’t used before the two started their fake dating, but it’s so impossible to gather the evidence Hyunjin needs when these two have spent literal years joking about how they’re boyfriends. They’re almost always calling each other pet names, usually outrageous ones (case in point two years ago: “my pumpkin spice latte” and “my daisy doll” amongst many, many more throughout the years) and they’ve both never been afraid of being touchy with their friends. 

Hyunjin leaves his stalking in the museum to a minimum because he doesn’t want to be caught and dragged out by security, and about half an hour into the date he gives up and walks out. You can’t blame him, really. At the fifteen-minute mark he was already so paranoid about Minho and Jisung finding out that he’s been spying on them because security guards are lifting his sorry arse out of the building. 

With that Hyunjin decides to go out and get some lunch, and he takes the ten-minute walk into the city to examine the photographs he’s taken. He’s captured one moment where Jisung turns around to face Minho in excitement and rears back at how close their faces are, but that’s only a set of four photos against the thirty of them having fun and genuinely looking like a couple. 

It’s when he’s wandering around aimlessly that he spots Minho and Jisung across the road from him. Frantically, he tries to change course, but the streets are too crowded that he decides maybe if he just keeps walking, no one will notice. He finds out he’s oh so woefully wrong when Jisung calls out his name, but he makes it through Minho’s interrogation without much of a hitch.

Once he’s safely inside the Asian mart, he heaves a sigh. 

“Jesus take the wheel.” 


	14. ★ Seungmin ★

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm currently packing for Japan and procrastinating work so have an extra chapter before Friday! This is also like a just in case I never get a chapter up on Friday since that's the day I leave too~

` _19th May, 2019_ `

**** 6:30am, Seungmin’s room, a lazy Sunday morning. 

The house is silent, because as mentioned prior, it’s 6:30 on a _Sunday_ , and no respectable person is up at this time unless they have good reason to be, of which Seungmin does not. He’s just an early bird who can’t ignore his body clock on the weekends. 

Maybe that’s why he’s not as attractive as Hyunjin. Or Minho. Or any of his friends. Because he doesn’t sleep as much as them.

Seungmin shakes his head. Hyunjin tells him he likes Seungmin’s face as is all the time; he’s been doing it for like 19 years. Maybe he should start believing him. 

Seungmin knows that when a day starts with thoughts like these, it’s not going to be a good one. Suddenly, he dreads getting out of bed, and burrows deeper into his blankets, grabbing his phone off his bedside table and taking it into the depths of his bed with him. He flits aimlessly through his multiple social media accounts, then settles for a game of solitaire, for lack of anything better to do. 

Eventually he stumbles out of his room, and by that time the rest of the house is already awake. His sister’s out for the day, but his dad is sprawled out on the sofa reading the newspaper while his mother potters around, trying to get in some last-minute cleaning before she heads out for tea with her friends.

He takes the time while the house is more or less empty to relax a little, conscious of the niggling fact that today’s probably not going to be all that great of a day. Thinking that maybe a nice hot cup of coffee might start to turn that around for him, Seungmin fires up the coffee machine. 

It doesn’t end up doing much, but it’s enough to motivate Seungmin into doing some work, which he’ll take as a win. He finishes one of his essays two weeks early, he’s made a start on his speech, and he’s pretty much on track, as far as university work goes. Yes, there is one report that he’s dutifully ignoring, but the report is based on his portfolio that he literally can’t finish because his themes are released weekly, so… there’s his excuse for not touching it. 

(As seems to always go with Seungmin and assessment, this will be the one he leaves too late and panics about four days before it’s due, while everything else he will have submitted a week earlier at a bare minimum. But habits are a hard thing to break, especially when you’re not making an effort to break them.) 

Seungmin makes lunch for him and his dad, a quick ham and cheese toastie with extra cheese, just the way he loves it. It’s not the most nutritious thing to be eating, but it’s satisfying, and it makes his day just that little bit better. 

 

★ ★ ★

 

It’s all in vain, Seungmin comes to realise at two in the afternoon. 

He shouldn’t have even tried to make the day better if it was all going to end like this. 

“Is it true?” his mother demands when she opens the front door, having returned from tea. 

She doesn’t wait for a response. 

“Is it true that you’re in a relationship with Hwang Hyunjin and you didn’t tell me?” 

Oh, _shit_. 

Seungmin considers, momentarily, coming forward with the truth, but then he remembers that his mother is a horrific gossip who has never been able to keep her mouth shut even if she wanted to, and decides against it. Which isn’t to say that he doesn’t trust her or he makes a habit of lying to her regularly or anything, but she is just far too likely to tell her friends about the secret that him and Hyunjin are working _very_ hard on concealing.

Which leads to: “Uh, yeah. It’s kind of new, but.” 

“Mrs. Han says you two confessed months ago! You didn’t even think to confide in me about that? What about me is so untrustworthy? And you never came to tell me the good news when you officially became a couple either! I feel so betrayed!” 

The words sound strange to Seungmin’s ears. They’re overly melodramatic, strung together like a poorly-written low-budget romance movie, but the hurt in his mum’s eyes tell him these words are very, very real. 

“Did you think we wouldn’t support you? Is that what it was? You thought we would kick you out for this “poor lifestyle choice” like in those movies?” she says through hiccups, no longer able to hold back her tears. “What have we ever done to you to make you feel that way? To make you feel like you couldn’t tell us? I never meant to make you feel like that, dear. I hope this is just you being secretive because it’s embarrassing to talk to your mother now that you’re a big boy, not because you thought you couldn’t trust our reaction.” 

“Mum,” Seungmin responds, voice shaky. There’s just something about seeing his mother cry that always sets him off as well. 

She yells some more, making Seungmin feel absolutely terrible, but in the end they settle it over steaming mugs of tea, huddled together on the sofa. Without telling his parents that he never mentioned anything because the relationship isn’t real, he fabricates a story about how they just wanted to test waters before making it something that’s known, since they’ve been friends since childhood and they didn’t want to potentially ruin all of that by being a couple. 

“You still could have told me!” his mother cries out in false outrage.

“I know, I know. But it’s just so embarrassing, mum! Everyone even placed bets on us!”

That makes his father spit his tea out, and it has all of them laughing, the tension eased. 

It’s only once everyone’s settled and Seungmin returns to his room that he takes the time to go over the words his mum had thrown at him in bitterness. His mind catches on a name, and suddenly, Seungmin is blinded by overwhelming fury. He snatches his phone from his desk, clutching it so tightly that the screen might crack.

 

**— private chat: Satan ☆彡 & Jisungus Bungus**

Satan ☆彡: We need to talk. 

 

Then, because that’s not satisfying enough, he sends one last message before setting off to Jisung’s house.

 

Satan ☆彡: Who the F U C K do you think you are? 


	15. ☀ Jisung ☀

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey!! I'm on a plane all day tomorrow and I'm probably not gonna have the energy to post this when I land so have it early!

` _19th May, 2019_ `

**— private chat: Jisungus Bungus & Satan ☆彡**

Satan ☆彡: Who the F U C K do you think you are? 

 

He keeps staring at it. He can’t stop staring at it. Obviously, he’s done something wrong, but Jisung does a lot of things, he has a busy life. Really, who _does_ he think he is? But more importantly, what is it that he’s done? 

It scares him that he can feel genuine anger in these texts. It’s not some lighthearted “meet me in the pit!” type stuff after a little prank war, this is the real deal. 

Jisung thinks back to what he’s done over the past few days, but he can’t put his mind on any one thing that he’s done to Seungmin that could possibly set him off like this. In fact, Jisung doesn’t think he’s seen Seungmin _actually_ angry in years. He’s pretty sure the last time this happened was on a group assignment in Year 9, and that was totally on him for screwing up and being a dumbarse. It was an accident, so Seungmin had cooled down quickly after the initial burst, but Jisung’s not so sure this time. 

He feels like this one is bigger. 

His hand hovers over his keyboard for a solid ten minutes until his screen goes black and he’s staring at nothing, trying to conjure up a response, but he comes up empty. As tempting as it is, he doesn’t want to immediately start throwing in apologies. Not when he’s not sure what he’s done.

Jisung knows his friend. Not particularly better than he knows himself, but enough to know that Seungmin will be coming over to talk. He’s the type to run into confrontation and damn the nerves, so that he can reach a resolution and continue on as normal. Well, not always. Jisung can think of a handful of times Seungmin has cowered behind someone else and not stood up for himself, but those are different. Seungmin has… situational confidence. Or something.

He stops worrying about trying to text back, and puts his phone down. He can give Seungmin the response he deserves in person. 

Jisung goes to the bathroom to splash his face with water. He needs to be prepared when Seungmin comes knocking down his front door with a storm on his heels. He towels off, has a glass of water to calm himself, and takes a couple of deep breaths before descending into the living room to wait. 

3:47.

He’s thankful that the house is empty right now, blesses the fact that DFO is having a massive sale that Jisung’s too broke to be spending his money on: he should have the house to himself until around 6, he thinks, which gives Seungmin ample time to let it all out. 

4:12. 

There’s a knock at the door. 

“Hey,” Jisung starts, but Seungmin isn’t having it. 

“You told your mum?” 

_What?_

“You told your mum that Hyunjin and I were dating?” 

He’s struck with confusion.

“I mean, yeah, was that so big of a deal? I was just happy for you-“ 

“You don’t get to choose when I come out to my family! They didn’t _know_!” 

The words rip through Jisung. He can’t imagine lovely, sweet Mrs. Kim as being anything but supportive, but his mind immediately goes to the worst case scenario, and his heart plummets. God, of course Seungmin is angry, Jisung just got him kicked out of the house and disowned! And all because he couldn’t keep his damn mouth shut. But when the initial terror fades away and Jisung’s mind floats back into Seungmin’s yelling, he realises that no, Mrs. Kim _was_ supportive. It was just… not the way Seungmin wanted things to go. 

“Listen, I’m sorry,” he tries.

“Well sorry doesn’t cut it! Do you know how many years I’ve known? Do you have any idea how many years I’ve known I was bi? No! You don’t! Because I wasn’t even properly ready to tell you. Jisung, you’re one of my best friends! I would’ve told you _before_ I told my mum. But no, you went and did _that_ , and you didn’t even know I was bi, did you? You just ran off and told your mum that I was dating Hyunjin, and _she_ found out before my own mother that I wasn’t straight.”

Not to be making light of a situation such as this, but had it been a place he could tell Seungmin so, Jisung would’ve said no, he had no idea he was bisexual, because he thought the guy was Hyunjin-sexual. But hey, maybe that’s something he can leave for when this all blows over. If this all blows over. 

“You don’t have the damn _right_ to do that to me. I don’t care if you’re my best friend. I don’t care that I’ve known you since forever.” 

“I-“ Jisung starts again, but he’s not sure what it is he wants to say after that. He closes his mouth. 

Seungmin keeps going, and he keeps going, and Jisung can’t tell him to stop. He doesn’t have the right to. 

“I planned,” Seungmin says slowly, “I planned for _six years_ how to come out to my parents. Six years, and you just took all of that away from me.” 

Seungmin’s voice dwindles towards the end of that sentence, like he’s only just realised the brevity of his statement; like in all his anger, it’s only until he’s voiced it aloud that he’s realised _just_ how much Jisung has taken away from him. 

And Jisung, Jisung knows he’s royally fucked up. Not that he didn’t know that the moment he received the text, but to think with so little effort he’d stripped something as important as this from his best friend… it’s not information he can take easily. 

For the first time in a long while, Jisung has no words to say. He wishes there was a stronger word for sorry; a word to use when sorry is barely the tip of the iceberg, but there’s nothing. In all the languages Jisung knows, there’s nothing.

But it’s Seungmin who apologises.

“Sorry. I know you didn’t mean it like that. I know.”

Seungmin’s hand is already reaching for the door, and Jisung wants to stop him yet he’s frozen — he can’t will himself to move.

“But I don’t think I can forgive you.” 


	16. ☾ Minho ☾

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AO3 screwed me over so this didn't go up yesterday, but happy December guys!

` _19th May, 2019_ `

**** **— private chat: bastard son of a bitch & Jisungus Bungus**

Jisungus Bungus: lmfaooOoOooOoooooooOooo kms!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
bastard son of a bitch: jisung????????  
bastard son of a bitch: what dod u do   
bastard son of a bitch: did   
Jisungus Bungus: fuck dude   
Jisungus Bungus: can i come over?   
bastard son of a bitch: yh   
bastard son of a bitch: but jisung  
Jisungus Bungus: don’t 

 

It makes Minho’s heart race. And not in the good way.

The good way is when Jisung cuddles up to him, or when Jisung calls him angel cakes, or when Jisung holds his hand. The good way is when Minho hugs Jisung and he melts into his side, the good way is when they’re sitting in the library studying, but Jisung falls asleep five minutes in and Minho can study Jisung’s sleeping face instead of his textbooks. 

But this is not that. 

This is the bad way, like when you’re waiting outside the classroom to walk into your final exam of Year 12 that decides your future, like when the principal calls your name over the loud speaker but you haven’t done anything wrong, like when you know when you open the door your best friend is going to be on the other side of it sobbing, trying to wipe his snot away with his sleeves. 

Minho opens his front door to his best friend sobbing, trying to wipe his snot away with his sleeves. 

“Oh, Jisung,” he says, coaxing the boy into his arms immediately. He’s repeating the words “I fucked up” under his breath over and over like some sort of terrible mantra, and Minho just wants to squeeze all of the sadness out of him. 

Minho doesn’t ask for Jisung to start talking until he’s calmed down. He just takes the boy into his room, settles down on his bed and rocks the boy back and forth, offering tissues every now and again. Not that Minho has ever had a good sense of time without constantly checking his clock, but it takes a handful of minutes for Jisung’s eyes to dry. Maybe two, three, four handfuls. 

He checks the clock when Jisung wipes his eyes for the last time and it’s 6:21, but Minho’s not sure when Jisung arrived. 

“He won’t forgive me,” are the first words Jisung finally says since coming over to Minho’s house. “He- he _can’t_ forgive me. He said he can’t.” 

_Who?_ Minho thinks, but doesn’t voice, just to let Jisung speak all he wants. 

“I did that to him, hyung. I ruined his life. I’m pretty sure I just ruined his life? I-“ Jisung chokes, words getting stuck in his throat, and Minho rubs at his back, patient. 

“I ruined Seungmin’s life, Minho. I ruined it. He can’t forgive me.” 

“Jisung, Seungmin would never do something like that. You’re best friends. We’re all best friends! You don’t possibly think-“ 

“But he _said_ that. He said it! He said sorry, but I can’t forgive you. And then he walked out the door and left.” 

Now, Minho really isn’t the type to demand for explanations when someone’s in emotional turmoil like this. He’s more the kind of person who just waits for the word vomit to come spilling out, and then piece it together as the person’s talking. But he’s so lost, and being this lost, he can’t help Jisung in the way that he wants to. 

“Start at the beginning, Jisungie,” he whispers. 

And so Jisung does. 

“I told my mum about how Seungmin and Hyunjin were dating. I was just so happy for them, you know? It was like _finally_ all the pieces fell into place, and it’s not like I told her I was trying to get them together, but I- I shouldn’t have done it.” 

As the story goes, this morning, all of their mums went out for tea together, as they have done once every few weeks for the past God knows how many years, and it was there that Jisung’s mum decided to congratulate Mrs. Kim and Mrs. Hwang on their sons getting together. The problem here being that Seungmin hadn’t told his mother, and the woman had returned home in shock. 

Minho fears, momentarily, that Mr. and Mrs. Kim kicked Seungmin out of the house and left him to fend for himself on the streets, but the story turns out to be different. 

Mrs. Kim had been offended, something like feeling like she didn’t raise Seungmin well enough for him to feel like he could tell his mother about the fact that he wasn’t straight. Minho, while not meaning to be insensitive to the matter in any way, thinks that this is not so big of a deal for Seungmin to be saying something as harsh as “I can’t forgive you”, which is a _very_ big call for the ever level-headed, rational boy who has always been their mediator when he’s not being a little shit.

It’s not until Jisung gets to the actual fight: the part where Seungmin came over to yell, that he understands. He gets it. He gets Seungmin’s rage. He gets the reluctance to forgive. He gets all the harsh words. It sucks to accept, because his Jisung is a slobbering mess in his arms that Minho doesn’t know how to fix, but he gets it. 

“A-a-and”, Jisung hiccups. “And the problem is he knows! He knows that our relationship is fake!” 

Oh God. 

“And I’m just so scared that he’s going to go out and tell everyone about it because of what I’ve done to him and I can’t- I can’t blame him if he does! I deserve that after all this but Minho you- you don’t need to be thrown under the bus too, I just- I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” 

“It’s okay, Jisung. Seungmin wouldn’t do that to us. Trust me. Trust _him_. And besides, so what if he does that? This was our April Fools joke, remember? We can all just come together and laugh it off because oops! We failed! It’s not that big of a deal. Stop trying to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders, dumbarse.” 

Minho is not this rational. Well, he can be rational, but he’s not one of the rational ones in his group. That’s Seungmin and Jeongin, and most of the time Felix. But rational is what Jisung needs, so that’s what he’s going to give the boy. He can save his panic for later. 

He can save it for when he’s alone. 


	17. ☀ Jisung ☀

` _9th June, 2019_ `

They get swallowed alive.

Not in the literal sense: Jisung is no Pinocchio, and he’s pretty sure the closest beach where whales are sighted is too far away for him to make a trip over. But in the metaphorical sense, absolutely do they get swallowed alive. 

It’s not a high school level of stress. There are no classes (and even if there were, Jisung wouldn’t get crucified if he skipped one to finish an assignment), he has no pressing extra curricular activities that he has an obligation to attend, there’s no parents watching over his shoulder, and there aren’t smart classmates sneering at him for still not being able to answer that one maths problem. He’s not even doing maths, thank God.  

The thing is, what Jisung wasn’t prepared for was for his second year of university to be this much harder than first year. Comparatively, to all of Jisung’s worst experiences, this isn’t so bad, but even so he still feels like dying. And he can see it in his friends, too. 

Jisung hates to say that he uses his assessment as an excuse to not go and patch things up with Seungmin, but it’s exactly what he does. In his mind, he makes up all of these things to stop himself, and they all just add up so well that he gets swayed by them. 

He doesn’t want to bother Seungmin. What if he distracts him from his studies? What if confronting him only makes their relationship even worse? Then he’d cause stress on all of their friends, and they’d all fail the semester. Jisung can’t be responsible for seven people flunking their courses. And what if Seungmin was using this to get away from Jisung because he’d never liked him? What if him confronting Seungmin caused the boy to tell everyone what Jisung did? What if he loses all of his friends? 

It goes on. 

It’s June by the time Jisung comes face to face with Seungmin again. He has no assignments to hide himself behind, and the overwhelming want to just be lying on his friend’s bed pestering him while he studies for his last exam (“Haha, sucker! I’m already done!”) is suffocating in a way that Jisung has never felt before. 

  

☀ ☀ ☀

 

**— private chat: jisus♥minhoe & minmin♥jinjin**

jisus♥minhoe: u n me, bearistas @ 2  
jisus♥minhoe: not negotiable, i’m buying u tea  
minmin♥jinjin: You misspelt spilling 

 

Jisung smiles. 

The text doesn’t mean that everything won’t turn to shit, but it’s a little bit of hope in the darkness. 

 

**— group chat: i’m gonna fuck my tutor up the arse**

changbeanie♥flex: Whose free for all you can eat   
changbeanie♥flex: I need to energise for my last exam tomorrow  
jisus♥minhoe: ah soz y’all no can do   
jinjin♥minmin: I’M DOWN BITCH   
minmin♥jinjin: Who’s*  
changbeanie♥flex: SH U T  
flex♥changbeanie: I’ll come!!! Have to bring my lil sister tho  
changbeanie♥flex: I’m LOVÉ her tell her I’ll pay for her   
flex♥changbeanie: ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥  
flex♥changbeanie: Oh STOP u don’t gotta do that for us I’m BLUSHING  
jinjin♥minmin: wretch   
flex♥changbeanie: O i   
changbeanie♥flex: Who else can come  
minmin♥jinjin: Hard pass   
minmin♥jinjin: Don’t like spending time with Changbin   
changbeanie♥flex: The-  
minmin♥jinjin: Nah I’m busy 

 

A sigh of relief leaves Jisung. With this, he’s almost certain that Seungmin won’t stand him up. 

 

minhoe♥jisus: i’m on a diet sorry   
jinjin♥minmin: ??????????????????????  
minhoe♥jisus: hot summer bods don’t just appear out of thin air u kno  
minhoe♥jisus: “bikini bodies are made in winter” that’s the proverb   
flex♥changbeanie: ??????????????????????  
minhoe♥jisus: y’all really THAT naive   
minmin♥jinjin: Naïve*  
minhoe♥jisus: um? actually both are correct, sweatie, and that’s the tea  
minhoe♥jisus: N E WAYZ   
minhoe♥jisus: before i was interrupted   
minhoe♥jisus: did y’all rlly think i’d skip out on all you can eat   
minhoe♥jisus: see u there hoes   
minmin♥jinjin: I’m literally a linguistics minor did you think I didn’t know that   
minmin♥jinjin: I’m just telling you that naive only came about because people are lazy shits so you should be using naïve and THAT is the tea   
jinjin♥minmin: TELL HIM HONEY BEAR   
minmin♥jinjin: STOP CALLING ME THAT   
flex♥changbeanie: That’s love, babey   
♥jeong♥in♥: Hey not to be a sudden advocate for changing usernames but  
♥jeong♥in♥: How is it when you make THESE our usernames they don’t change for a whole two weeks   
♥jeong♥in♥: Do you know how lonely I feel   
♥jeong♥in♥: “spankme❀daddy” burned my eyes but at least it only burned my eyes for 17 hours  
♥jeong♥in♥: Bring those days back I hate this  
minhoe♥jisus: but u hav 3 hearts?   
minhoe♥jisus: u legit have the most love out of all of us?  
♥jeongin♥: Why Do I Bother  
flex♥changbeanie: Wait but r u cumming to all you can eat   
♥jeong♥in♥: C*MMING?   
flex♥changbeanie: F u c k no I  
minhoe♥jisus: @changbin treat ur boyf right he’s all horny   
flex♥changbeanie: What is wrong with u man   
minhoe♥jisus: ain’t it the truth?   
flex♥changbeanie: d e e p s i g h   
minmin♥jinjin: d e e p s i g h  
jinjin♥minmin: d e e p s i g h  
♥jeong♥in♥: d e e p s i g h  
changbeanie♥flex: d e e p s i g h  
jisus♥minhoe: d e e p s i g h  
minhoe♥jisus: EVEN YOU 

**minhoe♥jisus changed the chat name to: kermit suicide**

changbeanie♥flex: Do it, coward  
changbeanie♥flex: Don’t actually suicide is not something we should joke about   
changbeanie♥flex: But dO IT   
changbeanie♥flex: JUST -   
changbeanie♥flex: DO IT   
minhoe♥jisus: ur paying for me at all u can eat too   
changbeanie♥flex: whOMSTDVE?  
♥jeong♥in♥: Such are the holes you have dog for yourself   
♥jeong♥in♥: FUCK  
♥jeong♥in♥: DUG*  
jinjin♥minmin: L A N G U A G E ??????????????? 

 

☀ ☀ ☀

 

Contrary to popular belief, Jisung can be on time when he wants to be. Well no, that’s not entirely true, because sometimes he’s still late to things that are really important to him that he tries really _really_ hard to be on time to, but what Jisung is _trying_ to say is, he’s on time today.   

He still makes Seungmin wait because the guy arrived ten minutes early, but he can’t be blamed for that one, because Seungmin knows Jisung, so if he didn’t want to be left waiting he should have planned accordingly and turned up later. 

“Hey,” Seungmin says when he spots Jisung, smile sheepish. 

Jisung hates it, because Seungmin has the gall, the _audacity_ , to look as if Jisung didn’t deserve every word that had come spilling out of his mouth that afternoon. Jisung is the guilty one, and yet it’s Seungmin whose eyes are filled with regret. He reaches over and slaps the guy on the shoulder. 

“Stop that, you.”

Seungmin shoots him a confused look, but Jisung just shakes his head and leads them into the cafe to place their order before finding a seat. 

Woojin is as warm as always, and Jisung is surprised when the guy greets him with his name. He’s surprised every time he comes in, even knowing that Woojin makes a habit to learn every customer’s name if they come into the cafe more than once. It makes him flustered, in a strange way. Kind of like he’s special. 

Jisung goes for a flat white, because he’s come to learn that Americanos are not nearly as nice as he used to think they were, and he orders a slice of cheesecake and a croissant, because both are to die for and he can’t make a choice. Seungmin, as usual, orders his usual. And a fruit tart, because Jisung is paying, and had insisted as fervently as he could. 

When they take a seat, Jisung is quick to get to work. It’s been tough, being in this state of not-really-friends with Seungmin for the past few weeks, and he’s ready to end it. 

“I said stop that!” 

“Stop what?” Seungmin cries indignantly. “This is my face, excuse you. I can’t exactly change it just because you don’t like it.” 

“Stop,” Jisung starts, then sighs, “stop looking at me like you’ve done something wrong. You haven’t done anything wrong.” 

“What the f-“ Seungmin stops himself, realising he’s in a public space and dropping his voice. “Are you serious?”

 

☀ ☀ ☀

 

It isn’t hard to patch things up. 

Well, that’s a lie. It’s incredibly hard, because both parties won’t stop apologising to each other and then getting mad that the other person is apologising, but looking from afar, in like birds-eye-view, everything is alright. Bickering is a normal thing: a sign that they’re friends again.  

It’s Jisung who caves eventually, because Seungmin is too stubborn for his own good and refuses to take Jisung’s apology. They wander off to talk about how assessment’s been, Jisung trying to apologise again but this time for the fact that he hid behind his assessment to not talk it out (again, his apology is shut down), and the conversation derails further from there. They share the croissant, then the cheesecake, then the fruit tart, and then Seungmin starts on a topic that Jisung would never have expected to hear come out of Seungmin’s mouth. 

“No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Absolutely not.” 

“Absolutely _yes_.” 

Seungmin wins. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello guys I'm currently really really sad about Seungmin saying he knows he's the least popular member :( I'm not like organising anything but this boy is my ult so I'm just here to spill my love for him that's all I hope you guys now know how much I love him


	18. ★ Seungmin ★

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've had three hours of sleep so I'll get to comments later and all that. Also, I haven't proofread this chapter even once so,, sorry for mistakes

` _25th July, 2019_ `

It makes Seungmin feel alive, the concept of being an undercover agent of sorts. He won’t admit it to anyone: being known as a nerd is one thing that he’s learnt to not mind and takes in stride (what is there to be ashamed of getting good grades, right?), but being known as a geek on top of that is something that Seungmin can’t say he’s keen for. It’s his own little secret. Not that Hyunjin doesn’t know; he’s the one who got Seungmin into this trashy, superheroes and spies mess.  

But now, this is the moment where the young grasshopper surpasses his master.Seungmin is determined: he’s going to soar above Hyunjin. He’s going to get Jisung to confess to Minho, and _right_ under Hyunjin’s nose. 

His phone vibrates, and he almost falls off his chair in surprise.At this time on a Thursday morning, people are usually still asleep, or not able to form coherent sentences as yet. 

 

**— group chat: protecc jeongin squad**

spankme❀daddy: hey hoes  
spankme❀daddy: ever wondered how like  
spankme❀daddy: wait lemme find a good way to phrase this  
spankme❀daddy: u kno how furries r like  
lonely: WHAT PART OF THIS IS PROTECTING ME  
lonely: AND WHY IS THAT YOUR USER AGAIN  
yeeeeeeeeeeet: M a t e  
spankme❀daddy: who r u “m a t e”ing watch ur mouth i’m ur hyung  
yeeeeeeeeeeet: fite me (ง •̀_•́)ง  
yeeeeeeeeeeet: MEET ME IN THE PIT  
lonely: Flixe it’s ok you don’t have to do this  
spankme❀daddy: flixe  
lonely: I have butter fingers shut up :(  
lonely: Aren’t you guys supposed to be protecting me :(  

**lonely changed group chat name to: attacc jeongin squad :(**

that’s s(e)o changbin: It’s too early for this  
yeeeeeeeeeeet: Sorry  
that’s s(e)o changbin: That’s ok babe  

**that’s s(e)o changbin changed yeeeeeeeeeeet’s nickname to: flixe**

flixe: :(  
lonely: :(  

**honey bear changed flixe’s nickname to: felixir of life**

felixir of life: OOH THATS SMART I LOVE IT  
felixir of life: THANK  
honey bear: You’re welc  
honey bear: Now can y’all shut up I’m trying to think over here  
lonely: SIR YES SIR 

**honey bear changed honey bear’s nickname to: honeybear♥lonely**

lonely: I feel…  
lonely: How do you say……….  
lonely: Less lonely  
honeybear♥lonely: ~*  
honeybear♥lonely: (that is a flying kiss)  
spankme❀daddy: OOF @HYUNJIN UR MAN IS CHEATIN ON U  

**spankme❀daddy changed lonely’s nickname to: mistress**

mistress: I-

**spankme❀daddy changed honeybear♥lonely’s nickname to: PLAYAH**

felixir of life: Do u ever regret making friends with ppl  
mistress: All the time  
PLAYAH: All the d a m n time  
felixir of life: Good me too  
spankme❀daddy: y do i get the feeling that this is abt me  
that’s s(e)o changbin: Because it is  
spankme❀daddy: h-  

**spankme❀daddy changed group chat name to: this is the timeline god abandoned**

felixir of life: Fuck, sure is, dude  
that’s s(e)o changbin: I’ll drink to that

 

Hyunjin doesn’t seem to be awake yet, judging by his inactivity in the group chat, and Jisung is most likely also asleep. There’s something suspicious about the fact that Minho is already awake and causing a ruckus, but Seungmin puts it aside for other, more important things, like the fact that this is the optimal time to begin planning for his mission. 

He sets his phone down, making sure that his vibrate is off first, then grabs a pad of paper to begin his planning process. For all that he said he would be Jisung’s wingman (despite the guy’s clear reluctance), Seungmin’s not entirely sure where to start. After all, Seungmin doesn’t have any personal experiences to draw from: just false stories of how he wooed Princess Hyunjin into being his. 

Seungmin kind of wants someone to bounce ideas off of, but there isn’t really anyone that he can turn to. He can’t ask Hyunjin, the whole point of this is to do it without the guy noticing, all while he’s trying to get Minho and Jisung to break up. (What can Seungmin say, he’s a thrill-seeker and a daredevil.) 

But if not for Hyunjin, there isn’t anyone else Seungmin can turn to. He’s not going to expose the fake relationship to the rest of their friends just to get Jisung together with Minho, that kind of defeats the purpose, and outside of Seungmin’s immediate close circle of seven, he’s not entirely sure that he can trust anyone. 

Well, maybe it’s best to start with a to do list first, and then he’ll get to the obstacles of how to execute his ideas later. 

  * Get Jisung and Minho together



Seungmin chuckles at his own terrible sense of humour, then crosses the words out. 

  * Minho research: 
    * Favourite flower 
    * Favourite colour 
    * Favourite restaurant 
    * Favourite food 
    * Dream date!



He puts his pen to his lips for a moment, then pens down the answers that he already knows. His favourite colour is mint, he likes… just about any food, but he does often have cravings for Pizza Capers late at night. And it’s always Pizza Capers, not Domino’s, or Pizza Hut, or whatever other fast food pizza chains are out there. He like all you can eat too, and takes frequent trips to various bubble tea stores.

Jisung is a disastrous cook when under pressure (and only slightly less disastrous when not under pressure), so Seungmin crosses favourite food off the list. There’s no point in trying to have Jisung make Minho a hand-cooked meal to confess with if it’s not going to be a meal. 

Regardless of what goes down though, Seungmin will need Minho’s favourite flower, and trying to weasel out what Minho’s dream date will be a fallback of sorts for if all of his other ideas fall through. 

He doesn’t really want to have to resort to that though, because if it’s some sort of activity then the two might not have time to sit down and talk everything out after all that’s happened, which is something they’ll probably be needing to do. You know, the whole fake dating becoming a real dating situation that has real potential of becoming messy if there’s minimal communication at the start. 

So flowers and a restaurant. That’s Seungmin’s first step. 

 

**— group chat: this is the timeline god abandoned**

PLAYAH: Hey I need some help for something I wanna submit in a competition   
PLAYAH: The theme is friendship and  
PLAYAH: Well y’all are my friends  
spankme❀daddy: AWWWWW  
spankme❀daddy: FRIENDS   
PLAYAH: Amendment: everyone except Minho is my friend   
felixir of life: Lmao mood  
felixir of life: Whaddya need?   
PLAYAH: Your favourite flowers?   
PLAYAH: Or the flower you think resembles you the most  
PLAYAH: Something like that   
PLAYAH: I’m gonna try and do something with bouquets maybe?  
PLAYAH: Haven’t really taken photos of flowers in a while so  
felixir of life: WELL I’M HERE FOR SUNFLOWERS BOI   
felixir of life: Those are some good shit   
PLAYAH: Thanks that’s great  
spankme❀daddy: i love daisies   
PLAYAH: No one asked   
spankme❀daddy: U ASKED????????  
PLAYAH: Idea cancelled I’ll look for another competition that doesn’t have friendship as the theme  
spankme❀daddy: what is this, attacc minho squad?   
that’s s(e)o changbin: Always   
that’s s(e)o changbin: (If you’re joking about the idea being cancelled I like azaleas)  
spankme❀daddy: AND I LIKE DAISIES   
spankme❀daddy: I LIKE  
spankme❀daddy: DAISIES   
spankme❀daddy: FUCKING PUT THEM IN YOUR PHOTO AND WIN THAT COMPETITION BITCH  
spankme❀daddy: D A I S I E S 

 

Well, that’s an answer if Seungmin could ever ask for one. 


	19. ☾ Minho ☾

` _14th August, 2019_ `

Minho’s fingers twitch. He wants to reach out for his phone, occupy his mind with something, anything, but he can’t. The potential danger of his hand slipping and contacting Jisung is far too large. It’s a force of habit. Even just finding some funny post on his Instagram dashboard, the first person he’ll send it to is Jisung. Scrolling through tumblr, there are so many things that remind him of Jisung. Facebook: Jisung. Twitter: Jisung. YouTube: Jisung.  

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with sending Jisung memes from every social media platform that Minho uses. It’s a fun pastime that many others of his generation also partake in. The problem lies in the fact that sending Jisung a meme will likely lead to a conversation with Jisung, and that, that is something Minho just can’t have. 

His phone buzzes. 

Minho hesitates, but picks it up. 

 

**— group chat: OH TAKE ME BACK TO THE STAaAAAaaAaRT**

Jeong is IN: Question   
Jisungus Bungus: TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT ME   
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: I BUY MY OWN DIAMONDS AND I BUY MY OWN RINGS  
changbeanie♥flex: ONLY RING YOUR CELLY WHEN I’M FEELING LONELY   
Jisungus Bungus: ONLY RING YOUR CELLY WHEN I’M FEELIN’ LONELY   
Jisungus Bungus: damn u beat me to it   
Jeong is IN: I still… have a question…   
Seungmin ☆彡: Ask away   
Jeong is IN: Not to be a desperate hoe   
hyunjinyoung: JEONGINNIE WHO T A U G H T YOU THAT WORD   
Jeong is IN: Minho   
Jeong is IN: Anyway   
Jeong is IN: CAN SOMEONE PLEASE READ MY ESSAY I’M SO KJASFDNRU  
Jisungus Bungus: ANYTHING FOR MY BABY   
hyunjinyoung: ANYTHING FOR MY BABY   
Seungmin ☆彡: ANYTHING FOR MY BABY   
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: I just busted an uwu  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: What subject is this?  
hyunjinyoung: actually yeah what subject if it’s like econ i’m not reading it for you sorry   
Jisungus Bungus: mood   
Jeong is IN: Weak  
hyunjinyoung: E X CUS E-  
Jeong is IN: Anyway it’s cultural studies!!! I’m just????? Lost!!!!!!  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: OH I DID THAT LAST YEAR  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: I’ll read it!  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: Pulled a 5 for it though biggest rip  
Seungmin ☆彡: Pffft   
changbeanie♥flex: Not every1 is a genius™ like you are arsehole   
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: Ughhh it was mostly I used APA  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: Which HAPPENED to be the wrong referencing technique cause I thought right  
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: I thought hey - there’s no way these ppl are going to ask us to use something as ugly as HARVARD  
Seungmin ☆彡: Ok no fair enough mate   
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: Also may or may not have misinterpreted one of the sections of the essay and wrote about something else but hey  
Seungmin ☆彡: I would also instinctively go for APA  
Seungmin ☆彡: Harvard referencing can go suck a dick, APA is my one true love  
hyunjinyoung: heart: broke   
hyunjinyoung: love: not real   
Jisungus Bungus: shut up drama queen   
Jeong is IN: Maybe you should’ve treated Seungmin better, Hyunjin   
hyunjinyoung: WHAT IS HAPPENING TO MY BABY BOY   
Jeong is IN: So I’ll send it here and whoever wants to give it a read?   
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: Ye  
Jeong is IN: Thanks guys   
Jeong is IN: [CULT1030Ass1.doc]   
Seungmin ☆彡: CULT   
flex ᕙ(•̀ ᗜ •́)ᕗ: ASS  
Jisungus Bungus: A S S  
changbeanie♥flex: God y’all are so vulgar and childish   
hyunjinyoung: yeah, so vulgar and childish  
hyunjinyoung: grow up 

 

Eventually, Minho gets tired of following the chat. He can see multiple spots where he could have jumped into the conversation, but again, everything has that risk of Jisung.  

It’s not that Minho is avoiding Jisung, per se. He’s just keeping his distance where he can, and the best way to do that is to cut down how much they interact with each other when they’re not together. If Jisung contacts him first, Minho’s not going to leave him on read or ignore the message, that’s stupid! And downright rude. 

He’s just in too deep. It’s been 5 months of this, and the most problematic part of it all is that Minho’s going to need to keep this up until the first of April _next year_ , because he’s dumb, and stupid, and a straight up idiot. Without even reaching the half way mark, Minho is way in over his head, suffocating on his feelings for Jisung. 

He needs to break it off. 

It’s not going to be a very easy task to pull off. While this whole fake dating thing _is_ more or less a joke, Minho gets this niggling feeling in his stomach that Jisung would be offended about him wanting to stop, not that the guy would say no — he’s an absolute angel. Minho just needs a good excuse so that there’ll be no hard feelings, then they can go back to being best friends as they always have, and Minho will be able to breathe again. 

Plus, it’ll be easier to get over Jisung once he’s not pretending to date the guy 24/7. He hopes.

Minho thinks about the best tactics for breaking up. It shouldn’t be so hard considering it’s not even a real relationship, but everything just seems too harsh for the light of his life. He can’t just walk up and be like “let’s stop”. He can’t do it over a phone call because that’s too mean. No texting either, because that’s just as bad. 

He considers finding himself a boyfriend, but then that would mean he would be fake dating someone to get out of fake dating Jisung which is quite frankly a _terribly_ stupid idea, and finding himself a _real_ boyfriend is out of the question because well, he wouldn’t be in this predicament if he weren’t in love with the guy he was already fake dating.

Maybe, Minho thinks, he can say he has a crush on someone, but he doesn’t have a chance because his crush thinks he’s dating. 

Now that is something that could work, except that it can’t, because there is no one in Minho’s vicinity that is worthy of being a crush other than Jisung. Alex from Tech 3 has a horrendous case of tall poppy syndrome, Chad is… a Chad, need he say more when the guy has a name like that, and Lee Lee (also a terrible name, though not as bad as Chad) from Choreo 1 is just too gloomy of a personality for Minho. Which is a shame, because out of those three, Lee Lee is the most attractive. 

Not to mention, how boring would it be marrying Lee Lee? Minho’s surname doesn’t even have the potential to change, which is incredibly depressing. Unless they joined their surnames, so Lee Lee would become Lee-Lee Lee. Or Lee Lee-Lee, depending. 

It’s a tempting thought, but not enough to drive him into pretending he has a crush on the guy. 

He’ll just have to continue thinking about how to break up with Jisung. Fake break up with Jisung. Or real break up, since the breaking up isn’t fake, it’s the relationship that they’re breaking that’s fake.  

Minho doesn’t know. He didn’t come into this world to become an Englisher.


	20. ☁ Hyunjin ☁

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ksdjhaksjh i'm super busy will respond to comments soon i promise 
> 
> as always i haven't read over anything i've written oops so sorry for mistakes

` _28th September, 2019_ `

Hyunjin’s house is a Certified Mess™. 

This is not a good thing, considering that tonight he’ll be hosting a massive party in it, but you know. Such is the way of life, sometimes. You can’t always get what you want and all of that. 

His parents have run away on a holiday for their wedding anniversary to the coast, and they’ve taken the dog with them so that they can all have fun on the beach together. Hyunjin appreciates the fact that they specifically planned their holiday out so that he could host this party for his friends, but by God he wishes he had some support.

Seungmin, Jisung and Felix are out of the question because it’s a party for them, Minho is only useful when you bribe him, Changbin has work until 3, and Jeongin is already helping him. 

“Why don’t you just ask Seungmin? He likes to clean anyway, he’s a neat freak.” 

“But don’t you feel bad?” 

“Yeah, but you look desperate.” 

Hyunjin pouts. Jeongin might be their sweet little baby, but he’s never really learnt how to sugar coat things. 

“It’s alright. We can do this ourselves. How hard can it be?” 

 

☁ ☁ ☁ 

 

Hyunjin is glad that he left Changbin in charge of all of the food when he’s done with the house. It’s clean and drunk people-proof, with anything remotely important or breakable locked away in the shed out the back of the house, but it comes with a very big cost. 

Hyunjin collapses onto Jeongin, the two smelling more like detergents than they’d like to. 

The only thing left on their list is to prepare the eskies with all of the drinks, but it’s no use doing that until at most an hour before people start arriving, so they’re set to just nap until Changbin’s shift is over. Jeongin is already conked out on the sofa, so Hyunjin pulls the boy’s gloves off and leaves him be while he goes to take a shower in the hopes that he’ll come out smelling less like BAM! (and the dirt is gone). 

When he comes out Jeongin has rolled off the sofa and is on the ground, so Hyunjin picks him up as softly as he can and takes him to bed. The boy wakes up the moment Hyunjin puts the blanket over him (damn it, he was so close), and he rubs at his eyes before deciding to also go for a shower. 

When Changbin arrives with the food, Hyunjin thinks it’s time to get the speakers blasting so that they can get into the mood while finishing up the last of the prep. He turns on Spotify Radio because he’s too lazy to make a party playlist (and last year’s is apparently “too out of date”), and to everyone’s delight, the first song is BANG’s latest hit ZONE.

“You know BANG’s from ‘round here?” Changbin says conversationally as he plates the 72 Subway cookies he’s brought over — 69, because they’ve each stolen one while preparing everything else. 

“You’re kidding. He literally exudes Bondi Bitch vibes, he’s not from out whoop whoop where we are,” Hyunjin snorts, as if he’s not from a city too, even if it’s not as big as Sydney. 

“Felix knows him. Used to be babysat when he was small. Same primary, too.” 

Hyunjin almost drops his platter of croissants. 

“He _what_?! How have we never been told about this?” 

Changbin just shrugs, before turning around and taking the tray of jelly shots away from Jeongin. He’s legally allowed to drink, sure, they gathered together and let Jeongin have his first sip on his 18th birthday, but if anyone thinks they’ll be letting Jeongin drink tonight, they are horrendously wrong. 

Because no one’s an ape shit buck wild party animal except post-exam Minho, the party starts at 6:30. Also, Hyunjin thinks it’s nice to be respectful of your neighbours, and he would also like to remain on good terms with them because they give him really nice Christmas presents. 

Seungmin turns up exactly on time, because he’s an absolute loser who doesn’t know proper party etiquette, but he comes dragging the rest of their group, so they manage to have a small pre-party amongst them before other people start knocking on the door, which is nice. 

Hyunjin smacks a birthday kiss on Seungmin’s cheek because they’re _dating_ , in case anyone had forgotten, and Changbin quickly follows suit, as does Minho, whose kiss is placed on Jisung’s forehead. It reminds Hyunjin of his mission that he’d abandoned because he’d gotten lazy with it, but he makes sure to store the scene in his mind so he can get back on the plan starting next week. A kiss on the forehead when everyone else is going for the cheek? Definitely suspicious. 

Guests start filtering through at around 7:30, and from there it escalates to a point where Hyunjin is so, so glad that he had the foresight to pack almost everything away in the shed. 

Felix is posing on the banister of his stairs while swinging his shirt above his head (and all of this _without_ having consumed alcohol yet), Changbin has whipped out his home karaoke machine that Hyunjin didn’t even know he’d brought, there’s a couple waltzing on the table in time to Changbin’s rapping, and Jisung has created a dance battle in the back yard. 

Seungmin, predictably, is sipping on punch as he talks to the owner of Bearistas, who had walked in very confused with almost no idea as to why he was invited. Nonetheless they seem to be having a good time that Hyunjin would feel rude to intrude in.

There’s a tap on Hyunjin’s shoulder, and he whirls around. 

“Hey, darl,” a girl grins up at him. “I knew you had feelings for me. You regret turning me down in high school, don’t you? Can’t say I was too surprised that you invited me to this.” 

Hyunjin feels his skin pale; a physical leaving of all the temperature in his body. He’d kind of just invited as many people from high school as he could for old time’s sake, and he forgot to consider… this. He feels an arm snake around his waist, and he curses himself. God, this is how he dies, cornered by all the girls from his “fan club” that couldn’t get the message- 

“What’s going on?”

The voice is lower than Hyunjin was expecting — it’s male — and it’s also very familiar to him. Immediately, he melts into the body that’s holding him, and he turns around. 

“Not much,” Hyunjin shrugs.

The girl in front of him sours from being referred to as “not much”, but quickly plasters on a fake smile that makes her pearly whites shine. 

“Seungmin! You and Hyunjin are as close as ever,” she says, voice tight. 

Hyunjin has a flashback to the times Seungmin had been harassed back in high school, and he pushes himself into Seungmin’s side, reaching for his free hand as well to twine their fingers together. He feels guilty all of a sudden, for never having properly apologised for all that had happened. The last time he’d tried, Seungmin had brushed it off saying that it wasn’t Hyunjin’s fault that girls liked him a little too much.

“Closer, actually,” Seungmin responds to the girl, blissful and nonchalant as ever, “we’re finally dating.” 

“Oh!” the girl jolts, voice impossibly higher than before. “That’s wonderful, I’m so happy for you. Now I’ve gotta bounce, because you all know I can’t leave Jess alone for two minutes or she’ll hoard all the booze, but I’ll see you two love birds around!”

When the girl (Karen, Hyunjin thinks her name was, but he’s not inclined to remember) leaves, Hyunjin turns to Seungmin and bursts out laughing.  

“God, I need a drink. I’m too sober to be dealing with this bullshit,” Seungmin wheezes. 

“Fuckin’ oath, my honey bear,” Hyunjin replies through his own laughter. 

Out of the corner of his eye he sees Karen(?) exit the party swiftly, friends in tow. 

_Good riddance._


	21. ★ Seungmin ★

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi y'all this chapter has been brought to you by a bitch who passed her driving exam! I'm tired so I haven't proofread it oops

` _28th September, 2019_ `

There’s something unsettling about the number 19. You’re well and truly an adult, past the legal age by a year, but you’re also still a teenager. There isn’t a “teen” on the end of nineteen for nothing, after all. Seungmin thinks the unsettling part about the number is that it’s easily forgotten. 18 is a milestone, 20 is the shedding of the “teen” and significant in its own way, but 19 is just… 19. 

19 is a number that Seungmin keeps forgetting is his age.  

By the time you hit 19, birthdays are events rather than gatherings. Or they are when you’re celebrating three peoples’ birthdays at once and Hyunjin’s parents happen to be out of town. 

Admittedly, Seungmin would have much preferred something smaller with his closest friends, but he knows there’s fun to be had in a gatho with the music pumping all the same. 

He loves filming people doing stupid things, and watching drunk teens desperately grinding on each other is, while disgusting, an incredibly funny sight. 

Seungmin wasn’t allowed to see the guest list that Hyunjin made, something about a surprise, but the boy had said that a majority of the not-severely-shitty to averagely-good people from high school were invited, along with a bunch of their uni friends. Which is why he’s surprised when the owner of his favourite cafe walks through the door with a small bag in hand. 

“Happy birthday!” Woojin says when he spots Seungmin. “Got you a little something, since it’s a birthday and all.” 

They chat a little, cups in hand filled with the punch from the alcohol free bowl that’s definitely been spiked. Seungmin’s downing the last of his cup when Woojin asks about Hyunjin, making Seungmin splutter. 

“How long’ve you two been going on? You seemed pretty close when you came into my cafe, but you’ve never brought him in before that. Not to sound conceited and like I think your first date spot would be my cafe or anything. Just- yeah. You know what I mean. Right?” 

“Oh, uh,” Seungmin begins, but suddenly the whole immaculate story he’d stitched together flies out of his left ear. Seungmin watches it float over to where Minho is dancing and get kicked as the guy dances. 

He looks over to Hyunjin, hoping maybe the guy will notice, come over, and perhaps save him a little, but he seems occupied with a bitch Seungmin was hoping he’d never have to see again.  

Katie, her name was. Katie Millson. Blonde hair, blue eyes, fair skinned, the Aryan dream. Sweet enough in passing, but so terrifyingly cheery that something had to be up. And something was up. Seungmin caught her on numerous occasions out behind the D block lockers gossiping and shit talking the very people he’d seen her being friendly with that day. And to make matters worse, she was vice president of the HHAS. 

The HHAS was a very serious committee, although rather new in comparison to some of the other clubs of their high school. It ran for five years, and consisted of girls from every grade, although mostly ones from Seungmin’s year. There were a couple of guys in there too, if Seungmin remembers correctly, but that’s not really important right now. What’s important is that there are HHAS alumnus at his birthday party, milling around like they haven’t loathed the very person they’re celebrating tonight. Yes, the HHAS.

The _Hyahnjin Hweng_ Appreciation Society.

(Katie has always had a woefully thick bogan accent.) 

Katie had a thing or two against Seungmin. Something about him having the audacity to always be standing beside Hyunjin and being an eyesore — making Hyunjin look uglier just by standing next to him, or something like that. Oh, and apparently he had a scheme to try and get Hyunjin fatter because he was jealous of his good looks, because he was buying Hyunjin Golden Gaytimes every other week. _Totally_ a fair assumption. Seungmin can’t even _think_ to blame the HHAS. 

But now’s not the time to be brooding about things long past, not when Hyunjin is all clammed up and looking ready to throw up in Katie’s forced cleavage. 

He apologises to Woojin and makes his way over to Hyunjin. 

“What’s going on?” 

 

★ ★ ★

 

“Yo Felix! D’you know if Hyunjin’s got a hill’s hoist out back?” someone yells out as the current song fades out.  

Before anyway can say anything, Hyunjin stands on the closest high thing he can find, and Seungmin nervously holds onto his leg; they did just down two bottles of beer each, and he’s not looking to be cleaning up bloodied noses tonight.  

“Absolutely no goon of fortune, you’re too close to the pool and I’m not having anyone drown tonight.” 

There’s a chorus of groans and sighs, but the crowd moves quickly onto looking for other games they can play. 

It’s when someone suggests a Throwback Thursday (on a Saturday) with a good old game of spin the bottle that Seungmin almost wishes that goon of fortune happened. 

With goon of fortune at least, he had less of a chance of being dragged into the game, and he could just watch from the sides and make sure no one opened the gate to the pool while drunk. But with spin the bottle, he happens to be standing right next to the person who suggests the game, and he’s immediately pulled into the circle by said person. 

Seungmin in turn pulls Hyunjin along with him, and the game begins. 

Almost half of the party is in the circle, and Seungmin spots Minho sitting across from him, Jeongin and Jisung a few people down, and then Felix squashed between two uni mates. He doesn’t know where Changbin is. 

As the oldest birthday boy, Jisung spins first, and the bottle lands on a guy Seungmin doesn’t remember the name of. Said guy just bellows a “no homo!” before Jisung gives him a quick peck, then leaves the circle in an existential crisis as his friends laugh. The bottle goes to Felix then, since it’s his birthday too, then it goes a couple rounds until it lands on Seungmin. 

The girl who makes her way across the circle is pretty, but she chickens out and gives Seungmin a kiss on the nose, trying to blame how drunk she is for her aim. Seungmin gives her a warm smile and the girl blushes, before yelling that she needs to go to the bathroom, stat. She’s not the best actor out there, but it’s enough for people to let go of the fact that she’s cheated. 

Seungmin gives the bottle a relatively weak spin, an unwilling energy in its turn. It comes full circle and lands directly on himself, to which he puts on a show to kiss his own hand very earnestly, which earns him a couple of laughs.

“Boooooring!!” Minho shouts out, hands cupped around his mouth and clearly unsatisfied with the turn of events. “Kiss your boyfriend!” 

Seungmin’s eyes go wide. He has no idea what percentage of the crowd is homophobic, and he’s not all that willing to find out. And not to mention, other than Katie he hasn’t actually explicitly told anyone else that him and Hyunjin are a thing. He turns to Hyunjin very slowly, and shrugs a sorry, before kneeling in front of him. 

He gives a short peck, and the crowd boos. 

“What? That’s how the game goes!” he retorts. 

“Is that how you kiss your boyfriend? Poor Hyunjin! He’s deprived!” Felix yells, and Seungmin marches right over to punch the guy in the arm. 

“It’s fine, Minnie. You can kiss me like normal, I won’t be embarrassed. We’re all friends here, right?” 

The crowd cheers.  

Seungmin gives his fake boyfriend the stink eye before he leans in for a “normal” kiss, just like Hyunjin asked for. 

He’s so in over his head. He’s just given his first kiss away in front of a bunch of drunk ex-classmates, not that anyone knows because this is the one thing he’s truly kept for himself, and now Hyunjin is asking for more. 

More that Seungmin doesn’t know how to give. 

But he tries. This time he sits himself in Hyunjin’s lap, grabs the guy by the neck and pulls him in quickly, lips crashing together. Seungmin makes sure to tug at Hyunjin’s hair a little, probably more aggressively than he should because he’s just a touch irritated right now, and when he pulls away his best friend is slack-jawed, lips glistening.  

“I-I’m out,” Hyunjin stutters, “I’m out, someone else take the next round I-“  

Someone (it’s probably Jisung, it _has_ to be Jisung) hollers. 

“Yeah! Go get some!”  

Hyunjin, in his effort to play along, takes Seungmin’s hand. Seungmin doesn’t say anything about the fact that the hand in his is incredibly sweaty, but it makes him nervous knowing that that’s a reaction he elicited from Hyunjin. They go up the stairs to Hyunjin’s bedroom, and he unlocks the door before plopping down onto his bed. 

“Let’s just chill here for like fifteen. That’s enough time for them to think we got all hot and bothered and whatever the shit, right?” Hyunjin suggests. 

“I mean, probably. Not that I’d know.” 

“Yeah.”

Hyunjin trails off, looking like he wants to say more, but instead, he curls up in his bed and pats the space beside him for Seungmin to sit down. 

They spend the fifteen minutes in silence. 


	22. ☀ Jisung ☀

` _28th September, 2019_ `

Jisung wouldn’t call himself a party animal, per se, but he does enjoy his fair share of jumping around to music with terrible alcohol in his hand. Honestly, he’d rather a straight coke (maybe a lemonade, if he’s feeling _daring_ ), but bottom shelf vodka mixed with tropical juice isn’t all that bad.

Hyunjin’s party is kicking — a lot better than what Jisung could have ever hosted, aside from the fact that he lives in an apartment and both of his parents work from home. He’s fluttered around playing almost every game they’ve got going on, and he’s having a damn good time. 

But the fun begins to fade once spin the bottle starts. 

Pecking some random on the lips is fine. Possibly being the reason for said random’s gay awakening is _great_. But watching his best friends who are happily dating unlike Jisung, making out with each other unlike Jisung, being in love with each other unlike Jisung… that’s something he doesn’t really like all that much. 

“Yeah! Go get some!” he shouts out. 

There’s an ulterior motive to it; he wants the lovebirds away from his line of sight before he starts bursting out into tears, but it gives him the result he wants. He watches, eyes trailing hopelessly up the stairs as Seungmin and Hyunjin disappear, and he can’t tear his gaze away no matter how hard he tries. 

Too far into this party, Jisung realises that alcohol makes him sad.

Not always, sometimes he gets wild and everything in life is amazing and his dance moves get a +20 boost and he’s on top of the world. But sometimes, alcohol makes Jisung sad.  

It makes him realise things he was trying very hard not to realise. 

This happens to be one of those times. 

Because Minho is a no-good stickybeak, he’s in Jisung’s face in seconds. 

“What’s wrong? You don’t look so happy.” 

Sitting there brooding, Jisung hadn’t even realised that four rounds of spin the bottle had happened since Seungmin and Hyunjin’s departure, and the game had finished, people dispersing for ultimate knock off Fanta pong, because they’re too lazy to find the bottle opener for beer pong. 

“Nothing. It’s nothing.” 

“Lovebirds got you down?”  

Minho knows him too well, damn it. 

“Come on, Sungie. There’s someone out there for you, I know it. You don’t know it yet, but they’re madly in love with you.” 

Minho doesn’t know him at all.

Jisung wishes that person out there for him was Minho. 

“Oh, Mr. Han! How you _do_ know the words to a poor girl’s fluttering heart!” 

Jisung grins, a very tight one that he hopes is convincing. Of course, as always, Jisung’s advances are taken as a joke. Not that he’d meant to say those words out loud this time around, but all the other times he’s tried, it always ends like this. He supposes he only has himself to blame though: this never would’ve happened if they hadn’t started joking about being a couple back when they were eleven. 

Maybe he shouldn’t be so harsh on himself. He was in Year 6 for Christ’s sake! There’s no way he could’ve known he was going to end up incredibly, painfully, _totally_ gay for his best friend. 

Minho takes his hand, giggling. He starts to drag Jisung in the direction that Seungmin and Hyunjin went, and Jisung tries not to let his stomach drop. If Minho’s idea of cheering him up is spying on their two friends having a great time that Jisung can’t have, well, it’s a very bad idea. 

They end up in the spare bedroom, the sheets indicating some other couple has definitely occupied the room before them, and Minho immediately runs in to jump onto the bed.  

“Come on!” he says, rolling over so that he can fling his arms out wide for Jisung to jump into. “Nap time! Then we can go back and have all the fun we want to.”  

Jisung regards Minho. 

“You just want to sleep, don’t you,” he replies slowly, squinting his eyes at his friend. 

“You caught me,” Minho smiles, absolutely shameless. “Now get over here, you.” 

It’s not good for his heart. The number of times that Jisung has been in a bed with Minho this year is far too high, and Jisung is too drunk to be putting himself this close to Minho. He’s also not drunk enough. 

“Only fifteen minutes,” he whispers as he lowers himself onto the bed. 

To Jisung’s absolute dismay, Minho completely wraps himself around him the moment Jisung’s close enough. He’s trapped, Minho’s breath tickling his neck, and he wishes so badly that all of this were real; he wishes that it _could_ be real. But as the story goes, Minho’s just a clingy sleeper (Jisung can’t blame him, so is he) and they’re best friends. 

Jisung mentally scolds himself. He shouldn’t be such a Debby Downer, at least for Seungmin’s sake. He’d promised the guy that he’d at least try to ask Minho out, and he was determined to give it a shot too. Just… not yet. Maybe in a few years, you know? After all the fake dating has died down and he’s over the jealousy of his friends being in love. Yeah. He can do that. 

 

☀ ☀ ☀

 

Jisung falls asleep in the end, although he had vowed to just lie down for fifteen minutes as a pillow for Minho’s nap. Instead, he opens his eyes to find that he’s turned around in his sleep, and Minho’s face is millimetres away from his. Jisung barely stops himself from screaming, and snaps his eyes shut to try and regain some semblance of composure. 

When he opens his eyes again, Minho is awake and smiling at him. It’s almost like a dream. 

Maybe it is.  

Minho blinks slowly, eyelashes brushing the tops of his cheeks.  

“Hello, my marshmallow baby,” he says, slowly, and wow Jisung’s imagination is really running wild, because that’s a new nickname if he’s ever heard one.  

“Hey angel cakes,” he whispers back. 

Minho hums, a satisfied sound, although with what Jisung doesn’t know. Because he can’t help himself and Minho looks so ethereal before him, he leans in and pecks the guy on the lips.

It tastes like vodka, which is unfortunate, but this is the most real Jisung’s dream has been a while, so he’ll take it.


	23. ☾ Minho ☾

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slight warning for drunk kissing? I don't know if it's necessary but just in case?
> 
> As always we ain’t proofread up in here so sorry about that :(

` _28th September, 2019_ `

Alcohol is a depressant. It like, slows you down and inhibits you and makes you have less control over yourself and that’s what inhibit means and Minho is stupid and Minho is also drunk and alcohol is a depressant, which slows you down and makes you have less control over yourself, which is what the word inhibit means. 

Minho is drunk.

He’s lying in bed snuggling close to the love of his life, and it’s not until after he wakes up from his alcohol-induced nap that he remembers that drunk Minho tends to be cocky Minho, and cocky Minho is a piece of shit _bastard_ that always does what he wants (which subsequently happens to be exactly what sober Minho doesn’t want, but he won’t get started on that rant). 

Cocky Minho takes the reigns for a moment, and he tests out the pet name sober Minho had been trying to hold on to forever. And for numerous reasons too, like the fact that he can’t go walking around wasting this pet name when they’re not even dating for real, along with the fact that Minho knows Jisung is conscious about his cheeks and will definitely draw bad conclusions, even though he can’t begin to imagine why.

“Hello, my marshmallow baby.” 

Minho feels like he’s floating. He’s conscious enough to know that this is real life and he’s not in some other dimension, but Jisung is cute, and Minho is drunk, and drunk Minho is cocky Minho, who is a piece of shit bastard that always does what he wants. 

Has he had that thought before? It kind of feels like déjà vu, so maybe he has. 

Then and again this is a thought he has almost every time he gets drunk.

(While cocky Minho likes to make a show when Minho’s drunk, introspective Minho likes to come and play from time to time as well.)

“Hey angel cakes,” Jisung mumbles to him, eyes a little glazed over, and Minho just wants to pinch his cheeks and love him for the rest of his life.

He wants to kiss all over Jisung’s face: his lips, his eyelids, his eye _lashes_ , his lips, his cheeks (but that’s a given that Minho’s pretty sure he doesn’t have to state), his nose, his lips, his little crooked tooth, his lips (has he said that one before?), his jaw, that one strange hair in Jisung’s eyebrow that goes in the other direction to all of his other eyebrow hairs that Minho feels creepy for having noticed because he’s pretty sure Jisung doesn’t know it exists, his _lips_. 

It comes as a surprise when Minho feels said lips on his. He almost tears himself away, apologies loaded on the tip of his tongue, before he realises that he wasn’t the one to initiate the kiss. He couldn’t have: he doesn’t remember leaning in. 

Even cocky Minho who gets what he wants would have remembered leaning in. 

Jisung still looks dazed when they separate, and when Minho meets his eyes he looks kind of… empty. Not there. 

His stomach sinks. 

He wants Jisung so much, and he’s right there, mere centimetres from his body, but Jisung isn’t his. He’s probably imagining someone else, and that’s a thought that hurts, but Minho is, as mentioned previously, drunk, which therefore means he’s cocky, and here to get what he wants, no matter the repercussions.

So he hooks a leg around Jisung and near shoves the boy closer to him before unceremoniously mashing their lips together.

There’s no protest from Jisung, just a grunt after having been kicked in the hamstring (understandable: Minho would say sorry but he’s busy doing other things, not to mention it’s not _his_ fault his legs are so strong), and in seconds the boy’s hands are in Minho’s hair. He grabs fistfuls of it desperately, tugging every now and again, and it makes Minho’s grip on Jisung’s waist tighten every time. 

Jisung squirms with a gasp when Minho squeezes his waist at a certain spot, and Minho laughs into the boy’s mouth. He’d forgotten how ticklish Jisung was, and he takes the reminder to sneak his hands up Jisung’s shirt and start tickling his ribcage. 

Jisung tries desperately to push Minho away, and he almost regrets tickling purely because he misses having Jisung’s hands in his hair. 

Eventually he ceases, because he keeps missing Jisung’s mouth with how much the guy’s wriggling around trying to escape the tickling. This time, Minho brings his hand to Jisung’s jaw to lead him in. Jisung’s hands stay on Minho’s chest from when he was trying to push away, and Minho wants to move them because there’s no way Jisung can’t feel how fast his heart is beating, but he leaves it be, too occupied with tracing light circles into Jisung’s jaw as he kisses him. 

The circles are supposed to symbolise the sun, because Jisung is the sun, but no one needs to be privy of that thought. 

Minho thinks he hears the door open and pulls away from Jisung momentarily, but he doesn’t have any time to think about people having seen them, because Jisung whines at the loss of contact, hands finally returning to the nape of Minho’s neck and tugging at his hair. 

The person at the door fades from his mind quickly, especially when Jisung’s tongue asks for entrance. 

For one moment, as they’re lying in bed, kissing like they’re actually in love with each other, Minho forgets that everything is fake. It’s only a moment though, and he hates that it immediately crowds back into his mind while he’s trying to enjoy himself. 

He just wants this one moment before he breaks it off. This one moment, so that afterwards he can say, “well I made out with him while we were drunk once, and it made me realise that I wasn’t in love with him because he’s a terrible kisser and that’s an absolute dealbreaker for me”. 

Except that that is a far-off dream for Minho because Jisung’s _great_ at kissing, and he’s also still very much in love with him. 

It doesn’t change the fact that he has to put an end to it, though. 

“I love you,” he whispers into Jisung’s lips. It should be soft enough that the guy doesn’t hear. And even if he does, Minho’s pretty sure he’ll be too drunk to remember. 

Suddenly, his eyes well up with tears, and he sits up, ripping himself away from Jisung. 

“Gotta pee, sorry.” 

He leaves the party.


	24. ☁ Hyunjin ☁

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guyssss if any of y’all are Aussie stays hit me up bc I got tickets to SKZ in Melbourne skfjdjdjf blease I like making friends

` _28th September, 2019_ `

It’s… awkward. 

Hyunjin wants to say something, diffuse the tension, but he doesn’t know what the right thing is to say. A joke, perhaps, would suffice in such a situation as this, but he doesn’t quite have the balls to go for one. He feels vulnerable, a little like an onion. An onion that Seungmin is peeling, preparing to chop. 

Hyunjin’s not the most poetic person out there, he knows. Shut up about it. 

They wait for fifteen minutes, just as they said they would, and when the soft tinkling of the alarm Seungmin set goes off, the boy gets up off the bed and heads towards Hyunjin’s door. 

“Wait-“ Hyunjin starts, but he’s not sure why. 

Seungmin turns obediently, awaiting a response. 

“Come here. And chew on your lips. I’ll mess you up a little before you go back out.” 

Very carefully, Hyunjin musses Seungmin’s hair, allowing his imagination to run wild for a little while. He calculates everything he does to Seungmin’s appearance according to what he wishes he could do, tongue between teeth in concentration as he goes. 

Once he’s done, he stands back a little to observe his work. 

“Something’s off.” 

He reaches out to push Seungmin’s fringe off his forehead. 

Seungmin examines himself in the mirror once Hyunjin’s done, then snorts.

“I look like I’ve been mauled by a magpie.”

“Fitting, right? I _am_ dressed in black and white.” 

Seungmin turns back around to Hyunjin with his nose scrunched up, and it takes seconds for him to start giving Hyunjin a post-make-out-or-maybe-possibly-sex-but-that’s-none-of-your-business makeover too. Hyunjin startles when his friend begins from… down _there_ , unbuckling Hyunjin’s belt and tossing it aside. He has a hand on the bottom of Hyunjin’s shirt contemplating pulling it out, but instead goes for unbuttoning a few buttons, then runs his hands through Hyunjin’s hair a few times. 

They stand there and study each other for a little longer, until Seungmin mumbles something that has a vivid blush blooming on Hyunjin’s cheeks.

“No. No one’s going to notice that.” 

“Hyunjin, the bloody HHAS is here,” Seungmin sighs.

That shuts him up. 

“Well I- I don’t know like… how to?”

Seungmin levels him with a look that Hyunjin can’t quite read, but it fades quickly and is replaced by a rolling of eyes. He scrutinises Hyunjin’s neck area before pulling his left collar to the side a little. 

“Right here, I think,” Seungmin prods at the junction between Hyunjin’s neck and shoulder. It sends a shiver up his spine. “It’s not so obvious that it seems intentional, but it’s visible enough to be convincing.” 

Hyunjin can’t use his words, so he just nods. 

Seungmin leans in. 

He stops a breath away from Hyunjin’s neck. 

“I’m sorry. I know you’re uncomfortable I just need- I need Katie and her fuckarse troupe of creeps to-“ 

Hyunjin holds Seungmin’s hand.

“It’s fine, dude. I’m not uncomfortable with you, or doing this, it’s more like… how long do these last? Because I really don’t need my mum asking questions.” 

It’s a wonder he’s able to say so much, but it’s probably because he can’t see Seungmin’s face since it’s still practically buried in his neck. If Seungmin’s gaze was actually on him, he would’ve barely managed a “you’re good”. It might’ve been something more like “yoogoo”, because Hyunjin has come to learn that he’s been lying to himself all his life, and he in fact has zero brain cells, not one. 

“Okay,” Seungmin whispers, and Hyunjin feels it against his neck. “I’m doing it now.” 

It’s a strange way to word it, Hyunjin thinks, but he appreciates that Seungmin wanted to give him a warning so that he could brace himself. 

 

☁ ☁ ☁

 

Seungmin leaves, and Hyunjin stumbles out a few moments later. 

He feels far more dishevelled than he looks, his mind an absolute mess. 

It had felt good. More gooderer than his mind can compute. Seungmin’s lips on his neck felt _good_. And now he has a mark that people can see, that tell people they weren’t just in there sitting in silence for fifteen minutes, and his heart races. 

He needs a bathroom to freshen up, but not one that’ll have a bunch of smashed teenagers lying on the tiled floor (which is incredibly dangerous, by the way, a bathroom is the _worst_ place for drunk people to be because everything is hard and they could hit their head and DIE, or they could drown in water and DIE, or they could get their head stuck in the toilet and DIE, or they could DIE).

There’s a guest bedroom that has an en-suite that Hyunjin prays no one has found, and he speeds down the corridor in its direction. 

When he reaches the door, the other side is silent (although what even is silent with the volume of music blasting from the speakers downstairs), and Hyunjin heaves a sigh of relief.

He opens the door. 

The other side is, upon closer inspection now that Hyunjin doesn’t have a door blocking everything, not silent. 

It’s occupied, two people tangled up in each other on the bed. 

Hyunjin goes to squeak out a sorry until he realises _who’s_ on the bed, and instead frantically shuts the door and leaves, significantly jostled by the sight. 

Weren’t those two fake dating? It seems like just yesterday when they had been all flustered, lying through their teeth in sheer panic. So when had everything changed? Was it when Jisung started calling Minho angel cakes? Were they already dating when Hyunjin had went out to spy on them? How had he not noticed?

In his determination to expose the two, he’d never considered that they’d actually grow a pair and start dating for real. It feels a little like a punch to the stomach. There’s a strange kind of jealousy that rises in him. 

Yes, he’s happy for his friends. Unbelievably so. But there’s still that feeling of jealousy, a little green monster at the back of his mind that taunts him for not being able to do something all his friends seem to have executed so smoothly. 

Hyunjin shakes his head. 

He’s not like the rest of his friends, where everything is clear as day and there’s literally no other option but to confess. It’s not like that for Hyunjin.

Seungmin doesn’t like him back. 


	25. ☾ Minho ☾

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy February! We're entering the last round of chapters here, so I hope I can give you guys everything you want!

` _30th September, 2019_ `

It takes two days for Minho to finalise his conclusion. Call him a weak man or whatever other petty insult you want, but at least he has the balls to actually do something about the fact that he’s hopelessly in love with his best friend that isn’t “spinelessly continue to fake date and pretend everything is fine”. 

Because everything is not fine, and Minho is not fine, and he needs to get out. 

In all honesty, he’s surprised he made it this far. He had thought surely, a month tops would break him. 

It’s kind of nice, actually. He’s found that he’s stronger than he thought he was. He managed to keep this up for months, and play a convincing act too, with only a couple of mental breakdowns along the way. 

But making out at the birthday party, that was the last straw. 

Minho feels terrible. 

He feels _terrible_. 

Did he or did he not just completely take advantage of Jisung while he was drunk? Granted, it was Jisung who kissed him first, but it was Minho who took it further, wrapped his arms around the other boy and kissed him senseless. 

And then he’d gone and done something as stupid as whispering “I love you” into Jisung’s lips. 

Talk about number one dumbarse of the year. 

In the two days that have passed since the birthday party, Minho hasn’t been in contact with anyone. Jisung included. He’s holed himself up, overdosed on Panadol (he had a splitting headache and he was _convinced_ two tablets weren’t enough, give him a break, taking three instead worked anyway), and he’s had Brooklyn Nine-Nine blasting from his laptop for the last 35 hours and counting.

He really be out here living the life. 

For all intents and purposes, it is a Monday, so eventually Minho hauls arse and gets on with his day. But that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t take his sweet time with almost everything, movements languid and sluggish. 

He’s planned something tonight, and he knows he has to do it, but for some strange reason he just can’t quite find the motivation to do it. It shouldn’t be so hard, breaking up with Jisung. He’s been thinking about it for ages; he knows he has to do it. Not to mention, they’re not actually dating in the first place.

Minho sucks in a breath. 

Better now than never.

 

☾ ☾ ☾

 

“Hey, Jisungie.” 

Minho’s voice is a lot more unstable than he had hoped for. He’d honestly thought this would be a lot easier, considering he’d been thinking about it for so long and all that, but here is, trembling before his best friend. 

Jisung knows something is wrong the moment he starts speaking. He pulls Minho into his room by the hand and closes the door. 

It takes a while for Minho to say anything again. Despite Jisung’s efforts he refuses to sit down, and he shuffles around on the spot while Jisung watches him, gaze far too intense for his liking. It’s not like Minho can fault him for staring: he’s come to talk, he looks like he wants to talk, but then he’s just… not talking. 

It comes to a point where it’s kind of getting a little ridiculous. 

“We need to break up.” 

He leaves a beat for Jisung to process his words, then speeds out of the room with a frantic “gotta go”. He vaguely registers Jisung calling after him, but it’s not until he’s locked himself into the next closest room that he registers the guy’s words. 

_“God, you need to pee_ again _?” A sigh. “Alright. I’ll be waiting!”_

It astounds Minho to some extent how much Jisung didn’t see the severity in his statement. Perhaps this is what he needed: just some cool-headed, _oh no biggie, everything’s okay we can call it off, keeping this up for a year was a little far-fetched anyway, you go relieve that pesky bladder of yours while I sit here_ business. 

But on the contrary, Minho feels like it’s making him panic even _more_. The fact that Jisung is so unbelievably chill about it all makes him feel stupid, like he’s been blowing everything way out of proportion. Which perhaps he has, because Minho’s never shied away from the title Drama Queen, but at present, it’s not a thought he wants to have.

Regardless, he remains locked in Jisung’s bathroom, huddled on the tiled floor and rocking himself back and forth until he’s deemed himself calm enough to face the world again. Jisung hovers worriedly around the door, Minho can hear him shuffling around, but he doesn’t say anything until a significant time has passed. 

“Hey, I’m real sorry bro, we’re going out to dinner for my brother’s birthday so I’m gonna go soon, but if you need any stomach medicine or anything you know where it is, right?” 

It’s almost laughable. But only almost. 

Minho doesn’t make a sound to respond, but he lets out something akin to a sigh of relief when he hears the members of the Han family leave the house. 

Once the house has reached absolute silence and he’s certain there’s no one around, he pries the bathroom door open slowly and crawls out on all fours. Like the sad, pathetic boy he is, he crawls all the way back to Jisung’s room and heads straight for the boy’s bed, nuzzling into the sheets with a heaved sigh. He feels like a total creep, but he can’t help himself. He reaches for a dirty shirt on Jisung’s bedroom floor and hugs it tightly, laying motionless for a few moments. 

It takes him a while, but eventually, he gets disgusted by himself and sets Jisung’s shirt back on the floor, smooths the sheets out a little so it’s not that obvious that he was lying in it, and gives Jisung’s pillow one last hug. 

He leaves the house a little sullen in knowing that the whole fake dating business is over, but overall relieved. Not constantly having his heart on the line should do him some good, and it’s about damn time he actually tries to get over Jisung anyway.

Tomorrow, everything will be fine. 

Tomorrow, they’ll be friends. 


	26. ☀ Jisung ☀

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just wanted to say thanks to y'all who comment bc you have to put up with so much of me just screaming back at you instead of giving coherent responses

` _1st October, 2019_ `

Jisung trusts Seungmin.

It’s a statement that some may think to be rather dubious, but it’s the truth. So when Seungmin says that Minho has a crush on Jisung, he trusts him. 

Well, not at first. 

But then slowly, with Seungmin’s insistence, he kind of realises that he kind of maybe sort of kind of knew that already. 

Not to like, sound conceited or anything — just that sometimes he noticed Minho would look at him the exact way Jisung had dreamt of, and it wasn’t too hard to piece things together from there (although admittedly it took him far too long to realise, and he only started noticing it a bit over a month ago). 

“Well obviously now is the time to swoop. He’s so head over heels for you he had to break off the fake relationship you’ve got going on, and he’s probably being all mopey and down about it. So all you have to do is magpie the shit out of this bitch and make his day.” 

Jisung frowns at Seungmin.

“Magpies don’t make anyone’s day.” 

“Why do I even bother with you,” the boy sighs. “Swooping? Magpies? Get it? _You’re_ the writing major out of the two of us, you should be able to read between the lines.” 

Jisung is perhaps not quite intelligent enough to connect the dots in a situation such as this. 

“Stop overthinking, that’s my job,” Seungmin says with a nudge. “You’re looking a little green.” 

Jisung gulps. So maybe he’s panicking about the prospect of asking Minho out even though he knows his feelings are returned. Could anyone fault him? It’s a nerve-wracking experience, and one that he’s never had before. Sure, he’s asked pretty girls out back when he was but a small half-pint and whatever, but there’s been nothing like _this_. 

He wipes his palms on his shorts. 

It’s comforting at least to know that Seungmin has really gone the extra mile on his research. Jisung would feel invincible if not for the niggling feeling in the back of his mind. They have a game plan nonetheless, and one that Jisung will execute this afternoon.

If he doesn’t chicken out. 

“Which you _won’t_ , because I will be one text away at all times _and_ I know it’ll go well.” 

Maybe Jisung should’ve fallen in love with Seungmin instead. It seems kind of appealing right now, what with how nice and supportive he’s being. Unfortunately for Jisung, Seungmin is a taken man. 

Not to mention Jisung is already head over heels for someone else.

 

☀ ☀ ☀

 

Jisung’s not stupid. He knows Minho is avoiding him, and so it takes a little more than a couple of texts to pull him out of the house. In fact, it takes exactly thirteen panicked texts from Seungmin for Minho to even take one step into the outside world in exasperation.  

At the park where Seungmin has told Minho to come to, Jisung, predictably, is sweating bucket loads standing around and waiting. He feels terrible for Seungmin who’s beside him dabbing all the sweat off with a mini towel, but the guy seems to have prepared for this exact situation considering he has four more in his backpack and has also pulled out a plastic bag for the used towels.  

They’re hiding behind a tree at current, a large oak that they used to play on as kids, and every now and again Seungmin peeks his head around it to keep an eye out on the picnic blanket that they’ve laid out with the sign “MINHO” propped up beside it.  

It takes twenty minutes of Jisung’s profuse sweating for Minho to finally show up. By that time, Jisung has given up standing on his own two feet and is leaning against the oak tree with an arm propped up on a branch, and Seungmin is down to his last towel. 

Minho’s footsteps slow significantly when he spots the picnic blanket and he approaches it with caution, mumbling something to himself. 

It’s at this moment that Seungmin gives Jisung a shove, handing him something that Jisung doesn’t register. 

“Put it on his head!” Seungmin hisses, and Jisung can’t do anything but blindly run forward. 

While Minho is standing with his head tilted to the side regarding the picnic blanket, Jisung sneaks up and places the flower crown of daisies he’d made with Seungmin carefully onto Minho’s head. 

“Jesus fuck!” Minho startles, whipping around. 

Jisung, sure that Minho will punch him in the face on reflex, drops to the ground. 

“Jisung?” 

Now, this is the part that sounds improbable (although Seungmin confirms later that it happened because he was watching from behind the oak tree) but at this point, Jisung is down on one knee and looking up at the love of his life. 

Yes, it’s because he thought he was going to get punched in the face and not because he’s about to propose but you know. Same thing. 

“Will you marry me?” Jisung says, because he’s stupid, and he’s down on one knee, and he wants to say it one day anyway. 

“Gross, no.” 

Jisung laughs, and pulls Minho to the ground. 

“You’ve been avoiding me,” he says after a round of bickering and getting comfortable on the picnic blanket. 

“Not really,” is Minho’s response. “We broke up, so I thought you know. We don’t need to be attached at the hip or anything.”

“I mean even before that,” Jisung pouts.

Minho is silent for a while. 

“Yeah.” 

“Well,” Jisung starts. He should have planned what to say. “Well I didn’t like that.” 

There’s more silence, which makes Jisung incredibly uncomfortable. He just wants Minho to say something, but he supposes it would be wrong of him to expect that of Minho when he’s the one who’s usually running his mouth a mile a minute. 

He hands Minho a sandwich that Seungmin made (for future reference, Jisung _can_ make _sandwiches_ , thank you very much) and gestures for him to eat up. He doesn’t speak until Minho’s taken his first tentative bite. 

“Do you like your flower crown? It- it’s made of daisies. You like daisies, right?” 

Jisung doesn’t wait for a response before he squeezes his eyes shut and ploughs through. 

“I think I like you more than you like daisies. I think you might like me but I’m scared I like you more than you like me. I think you’re really pretty. And I think you’re really cool, even though you’re a massive dork. I think you’re the best dancer in the entire world, and I think, if you’d like, I want you to be my boyfriend.” 

“What is this, lyrics to your new song? They’re not very good,” Minho snorts. 

Jisung’s stomach drops. Seungmin was wrong. 

_He_ was wrong.

He's made the biggest mistake of his life. 

“I think you might like me but I’m scared I like you more than you like me? I mean first of all, you might need a comma in there somewhere because you’ll turn blue in the face trying to sing that. But also, those lyrics are wrong because obviously I like you more.” 

Jisung’s head snaps up, and he feels out of breath when he looks at Minho despite the fact that he’s been sitting down for the last fifteen or so minutes. 

“By the way, is this a date?” Minho asks. His tone is casual, nonchalant. But Jisung knows Minho like the back of his hand. There’s this tiny tremble to his lip, and he won’t look Jisung in the eye. “It’s not a very good one. You know I prefer being a potato on the floor of your bedroom.” 

Jisung can’t do anything but choke out an “I love you.” 

He cries when he hears it whispered back. 


	27. ★ Seungmin ★

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Valentine's for yesterday? Have a chapter!

` _2nd October, 2019_ `

There’s something kind of bittersweet about seeing your best friends confess to each other. It’s not like Seungmin _tries_ to be a salty about it all, but it’s just kind of par of the course at this point. He kind of feels, in a strange way, like he’s lost. Which isn’t to say that Seungmin is an overtly competitive person, or that he’s been viewing this whole relationship business as some sort of competition because that’s just _wrong_ , but…

But it kind of hurts. 

Watching Jisung become a blubbering mess as Minho tells him he loves him; that’s some quality stuff. He’s waited a long time for them to get their shit together, and he’s glad that his best friends are finally, _finally_ together. But Seungmin just can’t shake the feeling. It _is_ bittersweet. Because in all his efforts to shove courage down Jisung’s throat, he forgot to leave some for himself.

 

And maybe this won't be as easy for him as it is for Jisung: Seungmin doesn't know how Hyunjin feels, but it’s getting to a point where he should probably do something about this whole business before they look up and find that they’ve been fake dating for three years. Knowing them, it’s probable, because they always seem to have a horrific sense of time when they’re together: cue the memory of little Hyunjin and little Seungmin causing their mothers to break down into tears because they accidentally stayed at the park for three hours when they said they'd be gone for half an hour.

But the thing is this is all far overdue. Seungmin has limits, ones that he passed two months ago, and he's practically bursting at the seams from keeping his mouth shut. So it’s scary, and he barely has enough courage to do it after having force-fed what he had to Jisung, but Seungmin knows he has to do this. 

 

★ ★ ★

 

“So I got Minho and Jisung together,” Seungmin says, lying back onto his bed. 

There’s a lecture to be endured after that, Hyunjin’s voice shrill and tinny over the phone as he cries about how he feels so betrayed, and by his own boyfriend too. Something about how Seungmin went and stabbed him in the back while knowing that he was trying to expose their fake relationship. Seungmin rolls his eyes. Stabbing Hyunjin in the back was _exactly_ what he was trying to do. 

It was for a good cause anyway so it’s fine, right? 

“I should come over just to give you a right spanking,” Hyunjin says in his grandma voice, the one that’s not very good but he tries to use often in an effort to flex on Jisung’s imitation skills. (It never works. Jisung is always better, and has never been beaten.) 

“I’d like to see you try,” Seungmin scoffs back. He won't think about how weirdly kinky it all sounds.

When the line cuts off, Seungmin knows Hyunjin is on his way. 

There’s a sort of strange finality in the way that Seungmin prepares himself. Initially he hadn’t planned to be confessing so soon, but it feels right to do it now, what with the topic on hand being people breaking free of their fake relationships to start a real one. 

Obviously with this short amount of time he has no elaborate plan to sweep Hyunjin off his feet, but he has a box of Favourites that he was saving to stress eat while studying for his exams that he’s sure his best friend will appreciate, and he can save the fancy dates for another time, for example _after_ he actually has a boyfriend, rather than throwing himself into the deep end when he doesn’t even know if his crush is reciprocated. 

“Knock knock!” Hyunjin screams from downstairs, and Seungmin peels himself away from the mirror where he’s been trying to fix his appearance for the past twenty minutes. 

“Oh this is cute,” Hyunjin reaches out to pat the new hairstyle Seungmin was trying out. 

It makes him flustered to know Hyunjin noticed it immediately, but it gives him an odd boost of confidence. 

They settle into Seungmin’s room quickly, speeding past Seungmin’s parents who are in the living room watching some stupid soap opera on the telly, and Seungmin shuts the door with more force than he intends, causing himself to startle. 

“You’re jittery today, what’s up?” Hyunjin asks lazily, already comfortably perched on Seungmin’s bed. 

He’s hugging one of Seungmin’s pillows, nestled firmly atop a freshly made bed that Seungmin would rather didn’t become wrinkly, but he’s never quite been able to get as angry at Hyunjin about things like this. (Take for instance the time he yanked Jisung so harshly off his bed that the guy got a nosebleed — something Seungmin couldn’t even dream of doing to Hyunjin.) 

“I just have something to ask you,” Seungmin says, pulling a chair over to sit on.  

“This isn’t about the ten bucks I still owe you, is it? I _will_ pay you back, I just really wanna buy new earphones so if you don’t mind can I save up for those first? You know how expensive Air-“ 

“It’s not about that,” he cuts in. 

It’s quiet, barely above a whisper, but Hyunjin stops in his tracks all the same. He sits up, although still clinging to Seungmin’s pillow, and bites his lip. Hyunjin’s eyebrows are furrowed in worry as he eyes Seungmin, and Seungmin squirms. 

“It’s not something you need to be _that_ worried about, calm down,” he says with a nervous chuckle. “I think.”   

The “I think” is what makes Hyunjin tense further, and the guy lets go of the pillow. 

“Seungmin what-“ Hyunjin starts, and it hurts when he chokes, eyes slowly watering. 

Seungmin surges forward, settling beside Hyunjin in seconds. 

“It’s not like that, come on, stop.” 

His hands tremble as he swipes underneath Hyunjin’s eyes. 

“I just wanted to ask you out, Goddamn it. Don’t cry, you’re making me nervous.” 

He doesn't register what he's said until it's too late.


	28. ☁ Hyunjin ☁

` _2nd October, 2019_ `

“So I got Minho and Jisung together.”

The sentence resonates strangely in Hyunjin’s head, and he can’t quite place why for a moment; something isn't right. He listens to Seungmin’s story — the full low-down on what happened with the whole my-coming-out-party-has-perished fiasco — and learns that somewhere along the way Seungmin had become an undercover agent and was working against Hyunjin to get Minho and Jisung together. 

This part is fine. Sure it might hurt a bit because the love of his life just stabbed him in the back (albeit not in a serious manner), but it's all well and dandy. It makes sense, and it’s amusing.

Then it hits him. 

Just days ago, Minho and Jisung were making out in Hyunjin’s spare bedroom. 

And so comes the scandalous realisation that at this point in time, the two weren’t together yet. In his shock, Hyunjin forgets to listen to Seungmin’s full story of how Jisung asked Minho out, but he’s pretty sure he’ll hear the full story in detail from Jisung five times over in the coming days, so he’s not too concerned about that. He does, however, need to come up with a fitting response. 

“I should come over just to give you a right spanking,” he says in mock betrayal. Seungmin has, after all, been working against him when he was trying to expose Minho and Jisung’s fake relationship. 

“I’d like to see you try,” is Seungmin’s response, and Hyunjin feels a sudden tug at his heart; a sudden urge to be beside Seungmin. 

He doesn’t know what it is, but he guesses that it’s the fact that their bickering is just never as fun over the phone. He always ends up wanting to see Seungmin’s reactions; wanting to get slapped upside the head when he says something particularly stupid. 

He hangs up the phone abruptly, and before he can think he’s at the bus stop. 

 

☁ ☁ ☁

 

Hyunjin isn’t prepared for what he sees when Seungmin opens the door. 

It shouldn’t be so revolutionary, but there’s just something about it that takes his breath away. Sure, maybe he’s seen Seungmin’s entire forehead before. But maybe it kind of takes his breath away when he sees a sliver of the right side of Seungmin’s forehead instead of the usual left. 

Maybe. 

_Maybe._

God, he’s so whipped. Why is seeing the _right side of someone’s forehead_ making his chest feel tight? He stares at it in wonder for perhaps a moment too long before impulsively reaching a hand out. 

“Oh this is cute,” he’s saying before he realises what he’s doing. 

It’s not like he’s _wrong_ , it _is_ cute, but it’s kind of embarrassing to be patting your best friend’s head just because they’ve parted their fringe to the right for the first time in their nineteen years of being alive. Hyunjin withdraws his hand as he feels his cheeks heat up, and he’s pretty sure Seungmin’s noticed how red he is in the face because the guy whips around and speeds towards his room.

Willing himself to be normal, Hyunjin settles down onto Seungmin’s bed as soon as he’s in his friend’s room, grabbing his favourite pillow and wrapping himself around it. He meditates, if only for a second, to calm himself down, then opens his eyes to Seungmin dragging a chair from his desk to sit in front of him. 

Seungmin looks nervous when he says he has something to ask Hyunjin. It makes Hyunjin jittery from head to toe, something he barely manages to conceal by clutching onto the pillow in his arms tighter than before. 

“This isn’t about the ten bucks I still owe you, is it?” Hyunjin asks. 

He’s desperate for it to be something as simple as this. And if it isn’t, then hopefully he can steer Seungmin away from whatever’s on his mind, and make him think about the fact that Hyunjin’s owed him ten bucks for two months now, and  is still yet to pay him back. 

It’s just that Hyunjin is, like most others his age, a broke uni student who also happened to drop his AirPods in the sink while reluctantly doing the dishes. 

Seungmin cuts him off before he can even finish explaining himself. 

Hyunjin’s stomach drops.  He feels the pull of Satan’s hands dragging it down, and he almost feels sick. This is something _serious_ , something that a little joking won’t push away, and it scares him. 

“It’s not something you need to be _that_ worried about, calm down.” 

The words do nothing to calm him down. But it’s the “I think” that trails along after that sentence that pushes Hyunjin over the edge. His mind is running a mile a minute. He can’t even begin to put a finger on what on Earth Seungmin could be so nervous about, but whatever it is, Hyunjin is pretty sure it’s bad. 

Like cancer, or moving away, or- 

 

 

 

Hyunjin’s never really liked how he cries really easily. It’s nothing to do with the fact Big Boys aren’t supposed cry™ or that he’s scared of looking like a wuss, but it’s kind of… inconvenient. Sometimes you don’t want to be crying, but somehow you just are. 

He’s not sure if it’s comforting, the way that Seungmin doesn’t miss a beat and just comes rushing towards him to wipe every tear away. It probably would be, if it weren’t for the fact that his hands were all shaky and tentative in a way that they’ve never been before. There’s every chance that Hyunjin could be overthinking things, but this is Seungmin. 

Seungmin, who he’s known since the beginning of time. 

Seungmin, who’s wiped away his tears for at least the past fifteen years. 

“It’s not like that, come on, stop,” Seungmin pleads.

It makes the tears come faster.

“I just wanted to ask you out, Goddamn it. Don’t cry, you’re making me nervous.” 

It makes the-

Wait. 

_What?_

Seungmin freezes, one hand on Hyunjin’s cheek, with his eyes glued to his lap. Hyunjin tries to stay silent so as not to draw any attention to himself while he takes a moment to process what he’s heard, but to no avail. His diaphragm (at least that’s where Hyunjin thinks it’s coming from) has other ideas, as he hiccups loudly, breaking the silence in the room. 

“Well then ask me out,” Hyunjin manages to stutter out through sniffles, already embarrassed enough to be able to not feel any shame. 

Seungmin’s hand drops from his cheek and he misses the warmth of it. He has at least stopped crying now, and he sniffles once more in an effort to clear his nose. 

“Will-“ Seungmin begins, but then he stops himself. “Wait, do you like me?” 

Hyunjin lets out a surprised bark of laughter.

“Are you stupid?” 

“I don’t know, am I?” Seungmin asks. “I feel like it’s more stupid to ask you to be my boyfriend without even knowing whether or not you like me back.” 

“I thought I was super obvious. Felix told me I was.” 

Seungmin looks a little taken aback by that, and his mouth snaps shut. Hyunjin giggles at the emotional journey he can see happening on Seungmin’s face, and he can’t help but want to kiss the stupid look off the boy’s face. 

“W-well would you like to be my boyfriend?” Seungmin finally asks, eyes hopeful as he looks up at Hyunjin. 

And how could Hyunjin do anything but kiss Seungmin’s stupid face? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for coming on this journey!! She's kind of rushed, but I forgot what exactly it was that I wanted to write as the ending oops. 
> 
> I haven’t proofread this because I’m tired as frick from jumping around at SKZ last night and I like,,, paid to go to Melbourne I’m gonna make the most of it,,,
> 
> I might write some spin-offs if everyone wants to see them, so please tell me if you do!


End file.
